Yankovic, Weird Al - School Cafeteria - Version 1 Lyrics






Is it on? Okay
1, 2, 1, 2, 5, 6
Let me tell you 'bout the school cafeteria
It's got all the others beat
It sells over four million burgers a year
Just think, that's almost two pounds of meat

My ice cream sandwich is lukewarm
But my burrito is much too cold
A school cafeteria is the only place
That sells artificially colored mold

You know a school cafeteria believes in mass production
They buy those lousy soy beans by the keg
I don't like to complain, but in a school cafeteria
You can get a taco and get Bubonic Plague

Today in the school cafeteria
They introduced a brand new malt
It's called boysenberry dysentery
Please pass the salt

The tunafish sandwiches'll make you ill
The enchiladas are enough to kill
Before you eat, you'd better make out your will
In the school cafeteria today

Say, boys and girls, tired of being skinny
Eat a school lunch today
All starch and cholesterol
Absolutely no protein
Remember, fourteen million teenagers can't be wrong

Feel your arteries growing hard
As you eat another healthy spoonful of lard

It's no wonder that the food is so gross
The health department is afraid to come close
So everybody better hold your nose
In the school cafeteria today

So listen very closely, all you girls and guys
Here's a little message to the wise
You'd better not try the chili surprise
In the school cafeteria today, oh yeah
In the school cafeteria today





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Yankovic, Weird Al School Cafeteria - Version 1 Comments
  1. T.... B....

    I can understand his wanting this in the closet, but I forgive him for being a young college guy. Heck, still sounds reasonable considering that The Police released Be My Girl Sally around the same time.

  2. E.... ....

    The "Junkyard Rock" trilogy:

    1: You Don't Take Your Showers
    2: Trash Day (Parody of "Hot in Herre" by Nelly)
    3: Inactive

  3. G.... ....

    I never knew this was a thing until it popped up on alyankovic topic. So I now this real?????????????????????

    G.... ....

    Yup they're real

  4. s.... ....

    So don't "Eat at Joe's".

  5. E.... ....

    SPOILER:







    that last track though... why, al... just why?

  6. s.... ....

    Some of these songs he did put on his albums.

  7. K.... C....

    Fun Fact: Most of the songs that were used in this video were recorded during the late '70s and early '80s

  8. T.... ....

    As a hardcore Al fan, I say this with love: Most of these are rare for a reason. XD

    T.... ....

    He sure found his groove quick after this though. :) (and just incase you think I'm bashing, he said himself in an intervew semi recently that he's embarassed of some of his early stuff/some of the first album)

    T.... ....

    I've no idea why. Sure, it's really different from some of his current stuff, but if I was him, I would look upon this with fondness. It's the equivalent of the Young Bond novels; 'Before the Boy became the Man. Before the Man became the Legend.'

    Plus, I find most of this stuff quite funny.

  9. M.... W....

    Hi hi! Is there anyway you could send these tracks to me?

    M.... W....

    I have all of these tracks. But how would one send tracks to another?

    M.... W....

    all Flower has to do is download this https://www.ytddownloader.com/ the free version of course, and Flower will have all the tracks when Flower downloads your youtube video

    M.... W....

    Yes! This will get me thru the rest of theday