Waits, Tom - Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis Lyrics






Hey Charlie I'm pregnant and living on 9th Street
Right above a dirty bookstore off Euclid Avenue
And I stopped takin dope and I quit drinkin whiskey
And my old man plays the trombone and works out at the track

He says that he loves me even though it's not his baby
He says that he'll raise him up like he would his own son
And he gave me a ring that was worn by his mother
And he takes me out dancin every Saturday night

And hey Charlie I think about you everytime I pass a fillin station
On account of all the grease you used to wear in your hair
And I still have that record of Little Anthony and the Imperials
But someone stole my record player now how do you like that?

Hey Charlie I almost went crazy after Mario got busted
I went back to Omaha to live with my folks
But everyone I used to know was either dead or in prison
So I came back to Minneapolis this time I think I'm gonna stay

Hey Charlie I think I'm happy for the first time since my accident
And I wish I had all the money we used to spend on dope
I'd buy me a used car lot and I wouldn't sell any of em
I'd just drive a different car every day dependin on how I feel

Hey Charlie for chrissakes if you want to know the truth of it
I don't have a husband he don't play the trombone
I need to borrow money to pay this lawyer and Charlie hey
I'll be eligible for parole come Valentine's day





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Waits, Tom Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis Comments
  1. S.... N....

    God Bless Him!

  2. �.... �....

    Эй, Чарли, я беременна и живу на 9-ой стрит
    Прям над грязной книжной лавкой, что на Юклид-Авеню.
    И я завязала с наркотой, и с алкоголем тоже.
    А мой парень, он играет на тромбоне и качается в спортзале.

    Он говорит, что любит меня, хоть это и не его ребёнок.
    Он говорит, что воспитает его как своего родного сына.
    И он подарил мне кольцо, которое носила его мать.
    А каждый субботний вечер мы ходим на танцы.

    И это, слушай, Чарли, я думаю о тебе каждый раз,
    проезжая заправку.
    Ну, у тебя всегда колтун такой в волосах от машинного масла.
    И я всё ещё храню пластинку Little Anthony and the Imperials.
    Но кто-то спёр проигрыватель — прикинь, как тебе такое?

    Эй, Чарли, я чуть не охуела, когда Марио повязали.
    Я, кстати, вернулась к своим предкам в Омаху.
    Но все, кого я знала, или в тюрьме, или в могиле.
    Поэтому я возвратилась в Миннеаполис,
    на этот раз, по-моему, надолго.

    Эй, Чарли, думаю, я счастлива впервые с того происшествия.
    Сейчас бы мне все бабки, что спустили мы на наркоту.
    Я бы купила салон подержанных авто, не продала б ни одного.
    Каталась бы на разных каждый день, смотря по настроению.

    Эй, Чарли, ради Бога, скажу тебе по правде.
    Нет мужа никакого у меня, он не играет на тромбоне.
    Мне позарез нужны деньжата, чтоб заплатить адвокату,
    и знаешь, Чарли,
    Я буду иметь право на УДО уже на День святого Валентина.

  3. T.... R....

    This is one of the realest songs I’ve ever heard

  4. J.... ....

    One of the greatest songs ever written.

  5. N.... M....

    415 people have no soul

  6. �.... ....

    私の子守唄なの♡

  7. E.... R....

    Must have been a big damn Christmas card or else she's got tiny handwriting
    Maybe she sent a few in the post and put numbers in a corner?

  8. M.... ....

    The worst part is when I realized that this wasn’t a parody 😆Fuck, people actually listen to this shit?

    M.... ....

    What ya gotta be like that for Mike?

    M.... ....

    PLUS I'm so fucking suggestible now I don't like it no more. ... what I gotta be like that for Mike ? Huh ?

    M.... ....

    Mike ? Imma confide in ya. I managed to get one boyfriend in the last three years and then I went and sassed him ONE TIME and now , even though I crawled on my belly and said I was sorry, now he won't have me back or even say one kind word to me or about me cuz he is a rat and a snake and a bum and a bad loser. He's a nothin' and a nobody. Plus he's dumb af. This dude so dumb Mike he hides his socks in his money. How about you hon' ? You hooked up ? Wish I was your girlfriend ..... you could wet your finger and stick it in my ear. I'd let you do that. I'd like it. ... x

  9. J.... C....

    Pure poetry

  10. C.... D....

    My favorite Christmas song....

  11. j.... b....

    wish I was your girlfriend Tom. You could wet your finger and stick it in my ear. I'd let you do that. I'd like it :)

    j.... b....

    ..... Cuz ..... the first time I ever saw you, Tom, it was like a big clean gust of wind came and blew all the trash off the street and everything was fresh and shiny and new and all the trees were singing. I didn't know before that the trees could sing Tom ! Anyways mister I'm setting my cap at you and oh I know I ain't but a scrawny little froth of a thing and - I'm admittin it - my chest is flat as Kansas and my hips are real narrow and, well, boyish but I got hair the color of straw and great big blue eyes blue as the ocean. You could swim in that ocean Tom and, I swear, when I'd set to fluttering my eyelashes at you. . . . . Hoo Whee! Why you'd just melt like a ice-cream. I surely know you would. And we could go live in Wyoming, or someplace like that, in a little log cabin with a chimney puffin smoke and a pot belly stove that we'd keep lit all through the winter. Just you and me and all that sky. And I would sew and cook for you and clean and scrub and keep the place all spick and span. I'd dress up pretty for you and put big gold hoops in my ears and you could write me a whole heap of songs and take me dancing every Saturday night and mess up my hair after I'd spent an age fixing it and I'd pout and pretend to be mad at you but I wouldn't really be. Not one little bit. And you could wet your finger and stick it in my ear and tell me what a swell kid I was and how I was fun to have around and we'd be happy Tom! Happiness gotta count for something. .... don't it ?

    j.... b....

    And in fact, if you wanna know the truth of it, I did actually spend nearly a year living with Tom in Wyoming and he did take me dancing every Saturday night and there was that one time when we was heading back to the cabin after cuttin' the rug till 3 , 4 in the a.m and we was singing a little bit and laughing and cutting up and Tom had just one hand on the wheel and with the other he was mussing my hair which I'd spent an age fixing and I was pouting and pretending to be sore at him but I wasn't really. Not even one little bit, and anyway right then and there the old motor just sorta spluttered and died and there we was stuck out there on the prairie and we saw about a trillion shooting stars. Each star a flake of falling fire. And then the Crystals https://youtu.be/cE_jOD2Fxvs came on the radio and Tom just hauled me clean outta the car like' n if I was a rag doll and we danced right there under all that diamond sparkle and he held me real close and said that I wouldn't ever have to worry about being hurt no more cuz he wouldn't allow it and all the stars were shining bright and then he kissed me ..... Happy new year friends. Hope everything goes well for you xxxxx

  12. J.... S....

    Ahh, almost through the hole. Merry Merry and Happy Happy y’all🖤

  13. T.... K....

    this album has so many really groovy tunes, but this one stops me dead in my tracks, every damn time. fuck!

  14. H.... F....

    Maybe the most honest song ever sang.

  15. L.... C....

    merry fuckin christmas everybody

  16. C.... A....

    Can't pull a junkie off the floor or wall. They gotta want to do it themselves. Then they will accept, maybe, some assistance. Love Tom and a life-long fan. Got me through many nights.

  17. F.... C....

    This is the old Tom "frost", that we know!

  18. d.... ....

    This song will always be a fantastic work of art...........

  19. S.... ....

    Hey Charlie, I'm pregnant and living on 9th Street
    Right above a dirty bookstore off Euclid Avenue
    And I stopped takin' dope, and I quit drinkin' whiskey
    And my old man plays the trombone and works out at the track

    He says that he loves me even though it's not his baby
    He says that he'll raise him up like he would his own son
    And he gave me a ring that was worn by his mother
    And he takes me out dancin' every Saturday night

    And hey Charlie, I think about you every time I pass a fillin' station
    On account of all the grease you used to wear in your hair
    And I still have that record of Little Anthony and the Imperials
    But someone stole my record player--now, how do you like that?

    Hey Charlie, I almost went crazy after Mario got busted
    I went back to Omaha to live with my folks
    But everyone I used to know was either dead or in prison
    So I came back to Minneapolis, this time I think I'm gonna stay

    Hey Charlie, I think I'm happy for the first time since my accident
    I wish I had all the money we used to spend on dope
    I'd buy me a used car lot, and I wouldn't sell any of 'em
    I'd just drive a different car every day, dependin' on how I feel

    Hey Charlie, for chrissakes, if you want to know the truth of it
    I don't have a husband, he don't play the trombone
    I need to borrow money to pay this lawyer, and Charlie, hey
    I'll be eligible for parole come Valentine's day

  20. E.... P....

    Merry Christmas to all the poor and downtrodden. You made it to this Christmas and heres hoping we both make it to the next one.🥂

    E.... P....

    OK hon. Here's hoping x

  21. B.... ....

    Oh, I'm joining the tradition others have created to listen to this song once every year at this time. 😱

    B.... ....

    An' I'm joining the tradition of wishing y'all ( a little late for which I apologise ) a very merry Xmas. Hope it all goes well for you in the new year hon x

  22. B.... B....

    A junkies Christmas is the only other recording that tops this holiday feeling. Listening from Minneapolis tonight... happy holidays my degenerate friends.

    B.... B....

    I ain't no degenerate Mister! You take that back yuh hear ?

    B.... B....

    I'm one of those degenerates from the Mini Apple, transplanted to San Francisco. I do a radio show in a college station there KFJC.org as dr doug. I just had to play this on Christmas Eve morning. Truth be told, I also edited in Silent Night from a live show. I love this song.

    B.... B....

    You never met a kid with simpler dreams. All i ever wanted was just like the poor old Eileen in this song ... someone'd take me out dancing every Saturday night. There ain't no merit in loving Tom. Don't earn you no place in heaven. Tom's easy to love. Who the fuck don't love Tom ? Loving all the freaks and weirdos and little kicked puppies Tom sings about is the hard part. But that's exactly where the poetry is. The poetry is in the pity. Merry Xmas. Knock ya selves out.

    B.... B....

    It could be worse you could be a cockroach drunkard facing homelessness for the 2nd time in a year lol! Beers two you! 🍺🍺🍺

    B.... B....

    Blah Blah - Merry Christmas. We'll be a club in the Minneapolis degenerate desperados, and listen to Tom Waits and know what he's sayin'. Here's to whatever year we're in

  23. S.... D....

    good stuff. Sean Dobson Hippie Music on YouTube. and Happy Holidays! much Love.

  24. j.... ....

    Merry Christmas everybody from Detroit Michigan

    j.... ....

    Yo im from 45 minutes north! Merry xmas

  25. P.... D....

    Merry Christmas!! 12/25/19....

  26. T.... N....

    Love it

  27. R.... B....

    I love it

  28. J.... D....

    Hello..

  29. R.... W....

    Merry Christmas everybody. Listening to this song annually going on 5 years now. This is the first Christmas since the divorce. And I admit, it sounds a little different this year
    Be well

    R.... W....

    Right Wing Death Squids first one since my separation, too. Just think of how much easier next one will be...❤️🎄

    R.... W....

    life is hard but your going to defeat it

    R.... W....

    @Lesley Roadley "you're" is the contraction for 'you are'. :-)

  30. I.... 6....

    MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OUT THERE

    I.... 6....

    How far out there ? Merry Christmas to you two notwithstanding x

  31. R.... B....

    At least when my baby is in jail and pregnant I don't have to worry about her getting pregnant and going to jail. When your baby is pregnant and in jail it is the best time to write a blues song. Bepoplalaoa!.

  32. B.... H....

    "I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things". Tom said it best himself.

    B.... H....

    Buy and Sell (1966) by the New York prodigy Laura Nyro re drugs and prostitution.

  33. J.... A....

    I feel like the whole reason my mother played me Billy Joel in my childhood was so I would start listening to Tom Waits in my twenties.

    Well played, Ma.

  34. T.... D....

    This song (and "Christmas in the trenches") gets played continuously every Christmas eve. A few stiff drinks, a cheap cigar and more than a few tears....thanks Tom

  35. E.... A....

    Life unfiltered

  36. T.... R....

    So fucking real.

  37. S.... N....

    Once my story...but I was lucky. it ended very well, but thanks, Tom, for looking at the world the way you do.

    S.... N....

    I'm happy for ya Sandra . I believe in happy endings . I surely do . Here's mine : " OK toots , you suffered enough . Now get your sweet little self over here. Fix me one a them bloody Marys just how I showed ya and maybe I'll consider havin' ya back on the team ". Dare to dream. That's my motto.

  38. J.... H....

    Senior year of high school, a friend puts on the "Small Change" album. I then went out and bought everything up to and including that one, and then every album since. Saw him live twice in Chicago. A bit of a fan. Love him in Buster Scruggs.

  39. d.... L....

    Imagine how much fun the 392 people who don't like this are at parties

  40. R.... W....

    heart HEART, harrrrd

  41. Z.... M....

    What a fuckin beautiful song

    Z.... M....

    And what a great posting name, Zappa's Mustache.

    Z.... M....

    @Shelley Handler Happy fuckin' Christmas ya bastards.

    Z.... M....

    @roy1949 It ain't Christmas till I'm drunk and slur-singing along with this.

  42. C.... G....

    Never heard this, it's pretty dam'd good IMO. Merry Christmas 2019.

  43. B.... ....

    Stopping by each year at Christmas to leave a comment here. My first one was 6 or 7 years ago I think. It's like quick notes, a shopping list (mostly liquor) or a "to do" reminder for next year. I never do the things I write but it's like a tradition now. Anyway, merry Christmas to all, talk to you next year.

    B.... ....

    Bband Merry Christmas to you. See you back here next year, when we’re shiny, brand-new versions of ourselves that we hope to always be next year...this year, though, we’re going to kick ass. 🎄❤️

    B.... ....

    Merry Christmas!

    B.... ....

    Stay safe. See you next year.

    B.... ....

    You're a gem. Those of us who get it, get cut a little deeper. Much love from Michigan!

    B.... ....

    See ya next year.

  44. G.... G....

    Waits' music is the truest expression of the word 'art'. When you listen to his music you will feel things stirring within you you didn't know were there. You will feel a desire to sit in smoky diners at 2 in the morning. Or walk the railroad tracks in the rain and jump a boxcar. His music will take you places and show you a different side of the world. Or he'll drop you into a deep well of sadness and let you see the people who have to live inside of it.
    He will show you wonders and terrors alike and he won't always bring you back to safety, but in the end you will be changed. For the better or worse - that's up to you.

    G.... G....

    Also he will make you long like crazy to have Manne take ya back ..... but then again , so will everything .....

  45. R.... P....

    388 thumbs down, I need a gun and 388 bullets. Merry fucking Christmas assholes.

  46. G.... G....

    My mama loved this song and introduced me to Tom Waits. I adored his music immediately.

    She died in '04 and I kinda stopped listening to Waits as much.
    But every christmas after her death I come back to this song.
    I miss my mama, even if we didn't have the best relationship at the end. I still miss her.
    Waits will never not make me remember my mother and will never not make me sad.
    But sad in a good way. A sadness that I choose to feel. A sadness that brings with it a release of emotions I didn't know I was holding.

  47. C.... C....

    Reminds me of a sweet hooker I once knew. Always in trouble, but always just a goofy kid.

    C.... C....

    How well did you know her?

    C.... C....

    T Dunph ...very well...

  48. A.... m....

    I read once, that Tom's own official fan club doesn't know where he lives!

  49. J.... B....

    Merry fucking Christmas everyone! This is some of the only Christmas music I can stand...

  50. T.... H....

    Tom waits Muppets

  51. B.... G....

    She sounds rough

    B.... G....

    Yeah just like sandpaper

  52. e.... ....

    This is achingly beautiful

  53. K.... M....

    that's the blues :(

  54. k.... ....

    “I don’t have a husband... he don’t play the trombone” saddest lyrics I’ve ever heard. Not only does ‘she’ feel the need to confesss she doesn’t have a husband, but that this fictional husband of hers doesn’t live up to the hype.

  55. D.... ....

    I grew up in Cleveland, in the 50s, 60s, & 70s,.. 9th Street and Euclid Ave. is a real place. Back then, it was a little bit on the skids, though 9th is close to the Public square, where the skyscraper named The Terminal Tower is located,....a gem building still standing in 2019. It resembles a smaller version of The Empire State building, it was erected in the 1920s. It was very grand, and was the terminus for our above ground trolley system. ( The Rapid Transit) And a glorious train station, as well. Lots of marble and brass.

  56. M.... Q....

    ❤️🌹

  57. M.... G....

    Cracked broken poetic magnificence!

    M.... G....

    Brilliant

  58. M.... a....

    can't beat a bit of electric piano - fantastic song as you would expect from Tom :)

  59. H.... G....

    Please god give this man some anti-depressant drugs and a cough drop

    H.... G....

    Hockey Girl no! Then he would just sound like me.

  60. M.... G....

    "Hey, wanna commit suicide with me? Wait'll I put on that Tom Waits cd."

  61. s.... l....

    I love you sweetheart

  62. T.... T....

    Was this song a warning about my ex that I missed

    T.... T....

    Thomas Truant : same here my friend.... I miss her so much....

    T.... T....

    dont worry about it,was in same boat,glad am rid of her have a good MAN in my life and never been better

  63. r.... ....

    I'll be playing this in my taxi as an antidote to the Xmas shit storm that will be played in every store.

    r.... ....

    Baby can you drive my car?

    r.... ....

    @Susan Predis Where to lady?

  64. S.... B....

    this is like the saddest most wonderful song ever written

    S.... B....

    Life is a cabaret old chum. ' S'only a cabaret x

  65. C.... B....

    The man is an icon. His music accompanies my life since so many years. I cant think of a universe without Tom Waits. I remember hearing "heart attack and vine" sometime in the very early 80s. I instantly thought this guy has it. Then I heard his duet with Bette Midler and I really fell in love with his sound.

  66. M.... D....

    I went back to Omaha to live with my folkzz!! Tom is the best of all this whole damned world!!

  67. y.... i....

    Damn. This shit hit too close to home.

  68. b.... j....

    Great unique artist

  69. G.... 3....

    Where has this been my entire life....

    G.... 3....

    Right here waiting for you

  70. K.... G....

    Probably the second saddest of Tom's songs after Kentucky Avenue.

  71. P.... R....

    Always fuc kin cryin

  72. D.... ....

    Cities in the mid-west, rust belt cities,....many have a Euclid Avenue. I grew up in Cleveland, Ohio during the 50s & 60s. It was a gritty, filthy, polluted skies from all the steel mills, coal powered industry. Our waterways, Lake Erie and the Cuyahoga River were black & shiny with industrial oils, and uncontrolled industrial pollution. Euclid Avenue in Cleveland, is a large street that comes out the factory areas, it crosses through many ghettos. Parts of it are so dangerous to travel on or live near. Through the 1950s, 60s, & 70s and most of the 80s, "dirty (men's) bookstores lined much of Euclid Avenue, at least throughout the core of the city.

  73. B.... H....

    366 brain dead idiots as of this writing.

  74. C.... H....

    Some sweet keystrokes and chord changes from the Great Tom Waits. What a human treasure is Mr. Waits.

  75. D.... B....

    Suena a toy story

  76. T.... M....

    und du nimmst mich
    zum Tanzen mit,
    das reicht doch

    ...

    T.... M....

    That's the bit about the dancing right ? How sad and pretty is that little image ? Does " leid" mean a sad song ? Is this a leid ? I used to think " Ich liebe dich " meant " I love dick " and I do but now I know what it really means and I'm saying it to you cuz any friend of Tom's is a friend of mine. Merry Xmas. Hope it all goes well for you in the new year xxxx

  77. m.... o....

    my other favorite Christmas song is Christmas in the drunk tank by the Pogues

    m.... o....

    A classic - but it's called 'Fairytale of New York'.

  78. J.... M....

    i don't know but this song just hits me right in the gut every time. beautiful beautiful poetry with a haunting melody. i saw him once
    at the beacon theater in nyc in the late 70's. he was fantastic but he looked a little toasted if you know what i mean. drinking whiskey
    and smoking unfiltered camels throughout the performance. can't live like that forever. then a few years later i'd read where he became

    a gentleman farmer somewhere. he said he knew he had to leave nyc when he was crossing 7th avenue one day to meet with his personal
    trainer all the time trying to balance his paper cup full of wine. glad he was able to get out!

  79. K.... C....

    Little Anthony and the imperials 👌

  80. S.... P....

    I'd rather hear this than Mariah Carey sing All I want for Christmas is you, while Christmas shopping.

  81. T.... Q....

    That Ring was worn out buy Her Mother...TKQ

  82. A.... M....

    Really love the lyrics at the first comment of this master piece 🖤

  83. H.... W....

    Now Minneapolis is a Somalian shithole city. Oh well I guess.

  84. M.... S....

    Pretty sure this the waitress from "invitation to the blues"

  85. S.... ....

    Hearing the song for the first time:

    (Piano intro): Damn, this is lovely...

    (HEY, CHARLIE, I'M PREGNANT) Dats a lovely hooker.

  86. D.... ....

    It is my life's ambition to get drunk with Tom Waits. Nothing else other than whiskey and cigars until the sun comes up- and then we'll go our separate ways. Sad eh?

  87. a.... w....

    Greatest intro ever.

  88. J.... L....

    Tom just doesn't know how cool he is. He can change a sad mood to one even sadder, make me feel like, hey, it ain't all bad where I am. It's a crowded choir out there, and everybody's got a song. Listen to him, you'll know what it's like when what you have becomes what you had

  89. A.... C....

    It's like some sort of Bukowski poem with music. If he had been a musician this is how he would have most probably sounded like.

  90. D.... L....

    Return to sender.

  91. J.... F....

    Best Christmas song ever written.

  92. W.... C....

    At age 19 I fell in love with a beautiful drifter girl. We started doing dope (herion) together. She had two kids. I started selling dope to provide for our strange fucked up family. After we broke up and I got clean I never talked to her again. Shortly after I found this song and it was like a ballad of what I had just spent a year going through. This song gives me tears almost every time “I wish I had all the money we used to spend on dope” I really do... I’m 26 years old now and that chapter of my life is long gone but this song will always make me remember that down and out queen I fell in love with and how we got into the hard and wild fiery life of dope and drugs, dealing, and outright love. We weren’t even in our twenty’s yet.. I always expect a letter from her just like this song one day. Thank you Tom waits for representing so beautifully the sad and true souls of us out there. Peace and love and forgiveness guys

  93. f.... ....

    Tom Waits gênio

  94. z.... t....

    sweet song .

  95. T.... A....

    Ah... Tom Waits just TEARS the TEARS right out of you... Never heard such beautiful lyrics from anyone else... and I've heard a LOT of lyrics! And the way he sings 'em! Love ya Tom! ;)

  96. M.... L....

    just gotta be 100% honest love this song to death and ive never made it past the second verse without bursting into tears

  97. R.... ....

    “No amount of soul searching would fix my past. There was no magical Band-Aid I could stick on my heart, no special glue I could use to make myself whole again. I had shattered to pieces like a fragile vase on concrete; some fragments could be roughly cobbled back together, but many of my vital parts had simply turned to dust, pulverized and scattered by the first gust of wind.” 
    Julie Johnson, Like Gravity
    .
    .
    .
    .
    I made a career of trying to save fish from drowning. No matter how much you love them, you can't save anyone from themselves, Will

  98. V.... B....

    best song by Tom for me , he tells great story's no repetition ..just a great story