Tenacious D - Friendship Test (Skit) Lyrics

[phone rings]

[spoken]
[click]

[KG:] Two Kings.
[JB:] Hey Kage.
[KG:] Hey!
[JB:] How's it goin'?
[KG:] Good, good...
[JB:] What are you--what are you doin'?
[KG:] Oh, god, I was just, I was-
[JB:] I love you.
[KG:] ...what'd you say?
[JB:] I said I love you, man. I just wanted to say it.
[KG:] Dude, thanks... thank you... that's awesome. Fuckin' awesome. I mean, uh... that's cool you can say that.
[JB:] Don't you have something to say?
[KG:] No. (pause) Aw, I mean, I, uh, I like you... I like you too, dude.
[JB:] Whoa, whoa. LIKE? HO HO HO, MAN! I'm glad I fuckin' did this test on you, the friendship test!
[KG:] What?
[JB:] No, man--
[KG:] What are you talkin' about?
[JB:] That---what happened before when I said I love you, that was a test.
Because, man, I could've made a total ASS of myself if I hadn't done this test on you.
[whistles] HOO HOO!
[KG:] Wait, you don't--
[JB:] Boy.
[KG:] You don't really love me?
[JB:] Dude, listen. You fuckin' passed the test, okay? But BARELY. You know what you got?
[KG:] What'd I get?
[JB:] F+.

[click]