Rhett & Link - I'm A Textpert (Rap Battle) Lyrics
[Rhett & Link talking:]
Hey
Whatcha doing?
Driving, whatcha doing?
Driving and texting..
[Link:]
Yes, because. I'm a textpert
An expert at texting
Rejecting the notion that you think I'll be wrecking
Due to the fact that I'm distracted?!
I multi-task best behind the wheel when I get textually active
YOU should keep both eyes on the road, sir. For real
Leave it to a pro. Be incommunicado
Until you get to where you need to go, this conversation's O. Ver
[Rhett & Link talking:]
No it isn't?
Yes it is
No it isn't!
[Rhett:]
Cause I'm a textpert! An expert at texting
Pressing, my keypad when my car's not resting
I can divide my attention up
I got so much attention, I've got an eleven-tion
With one eye on the road; one eye on my phone
I texted-in this drive-thru order for my latte and scone
Thank you
Now I'm-n-a text-n-eat-n-sip-n-dip and shift
It in to D and then chin-drive home
[Hook: Rhett & Link:]
I'm a textpert
A textin' traveler who doesn't need a chauffeur-eur-eur-eur-eur
I'm a textpert
Don't worry, nobody's gonna get hurt-urt-urt-urt-urt
[Link:]
Sometimes I text both sides of a conversation
Cause it's tough to keep up with my text-ual pacing
On rare occasion, when I've got nothing to text about
I text myself reminders of what I'm doing now
[Rhett:]
I carry on, more concurrent conversations
Than one phone alone is prone to accept
So, I've
Tested and perfected my patented method:
The second handset hands-free toe text
[Link:]
I ride with my Swedish Masseuse
She gimme deep tissue thumb shiatzu
[Rhett:]
My yogi shows me hand yoga poses, like:
Downward Facing Pinky and Thumb Lotus
[Link:]
I'll never stoop so low, as to text photos
Instead I text the correct combo of 1's and 0's
[Rhett:]
I'm an artiste! Using ASCII!
I just texted this toad to an art gallery
[Link:]
I text more, than the next bored pre-pubescent tween!
In fact I've text-induced my own second puberty!
[Rhett:]
How does that work exactly?
[Link:]
Everything that happened before is happening some more
That's all I'm comfortable sharing at this time...
[Rhett:]
I gave a lift to a drifter!
And texted his estranged sister
And now I'm hostin' em here for dinner!
[Link:]
Well did I mention I'm a text-itrician?
A next-gen OB/GYN, a Lamaze text-nician
[Rhett:]
Well, I'm the next Dr. Phil of SMS
[Link:]
I'm poppin' out babies with the power of text!
[Hook]
[Rhett and Link talking:]
By the way, where're you headed son?
Headed West on 421
421?
Uh-huh
West?!
Yes. You?
Me? I'm headed...
[CRASH]
"If you're texting, you're not driving."
Other Lyrics by Artist
- Rhett & Link - Epic Rap Battle: Nerd Vs. Geek
- Rhett & Link - If Bubbles Were Bullets
- Rhett & Link - It's My Belly Button
- Rhett & Link - Just Being Honest
- Rhett & Link - My Favorite Pillow
- Rhett & Link - My Hair Goes...
- Rhett & Link - My OCD
- Rhett & Link - Nilla Wafer Top Hat Time
- Rhett & Link - One Direction Caption Fail
- Rhett & Link - I'm On Vacation
- Rhett & Link - I'm A Textpert (Rap Battle)
- Rhett & Link - Fast Food Folk Song
- Rhett & Link - Fear Of Frogs
- Rhett & Link - Folsom Prison Beasts!
- Rhett & Link - Friends 'til The End
- Rhett & Link - Get Off The Phone
- Rhett & Link - Have You Ever?
- Rhett & Link - I Am A Thoughtful Guy
Rand Lyrics
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Rhett & Link I'm A Textpert (Rap Battle) Comments
At 1:10 my grandpa started to shout incoming and hid under his blanket
I got a "Don't Text And Drive" ad before the video
Loldamort
anyone here 2020
0:23 - 0:41 = Look at Link's neck, O_O
Its the mic
Easy solution, use the heccing microphone button so you can text and drive.
you guys should be arrested for texting while driving
I recognized iJustine lol
The chin-driving bit actually makes me very anxious
*2020?*
they need sunscreen!!
0:32 my favorite part
I knew on super late but what are the ltrics
Is it just me or I saw iJustine?
Almost 2020 and still missing these songs? Anyone?
All moms rise up
Here is your theme song
Como mola os admiro sois unos que molan
2:21 Don't you just love it when people drive into a hospital while having a baby?
Haha funny
2019 anybody?
Almost 2020
I was expexting them to crash into each other
When the beat dropped and they were driving through space (or whatever) my jaw dropped
Julianne Wilkins Driving through space? Sounds like some kind of 2080 crazy technology
2:21 i just realized they're in a hospital
Mudders Martain WOW here want a gold metal?
Danny Boi gaming and sports No but I’d like to know-do you like the new fifa, ya know the one that clearly is the same as the last one?
That must’ve been dangerous to film
There is a song littorally saying how you should get off your phone and this song just threw it all the window
E N D U P I N T H E T R U N K O F A N O T H E R A U T O M O B I L E
getting so nostalgic from these vids 😭😭
*safety HAS LEFT THE CHAt*
WHO WON!? WHOS NEXT!? YOU DECI-
Oops, wrong channel!
If Karen was a TV show, this would be it's theme song
Is Link old school Eminem?
What’s with links neck
Baby I’m a textpert
You can wear my sweatshirt
“That doesn’t need a chauffeur-eur-eur-eur”
*I felt that*
(I laugh in I only drive with a chauffeur language)
Do people still watch this is 2019?
Yah son
Begone REEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEAeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Does that answer your question😂
That was their coma
This should be a part of the Drivers Education safety videos.
I’m a textpert and expert at texting.
ok boomer
Sience there's no disclaimer, dont text in drive the following actions can cause serious harm
They legit showed us this song in drivers training
2:04 masseuse dies inside
Just the other day I heard a facebook story about a guy that was texting while driving and he drove straight into the bumper of a semi at 80 mph. His head was found in the backseat and his phone, still in his hand, texting a friend. The picture looked like someone covered the back of the truck with tinfoil and made it look like a bumper. Either ask Siri to read it, have your friend read it, or wait. Life is beautiful, don't throw it away over an electronic.
It took me 5 years for this to get recommended to me
If anyone's interested, the binary says "´Ô\S*Kiki1-©1Z¸¦U4U§U+¥¥¬©R+LÝ·JKtªÖ¥)V+X®RjÑV¥¥Kq"
This should be on last words
How the baby just pops out XD
also who thinks they should make more songs
10001001110000010101010110101010101010101101101101101000110001010110101
in my state its illegal to even hold your phone while driving
Is almost everywhere point there making is it's not safe
Man Textpert, Bellybutton, I'm on Vacation, and It's my OCD all in 1 year. 2014 was the YEAR of Rhett and Link songs
The beginning sounds like an Discount Eminem song
Reminds me of Eminem
2019 boys
That's not safe. They have no seatbelts and they are driving 50mph
I showed this to my friend with epilepsy and he likes it so much he’s on the floor on his back dancing
(————\/————)
\. O o. O
I tried to do a frog so here
Frog
Ok don’t do this in real lifr
Don't text and drive
Who will be the nextpert textpert? (Donald Trump.)
If you’re texting and driving, get into a car crash. It means you’re not an textepert, so leave it to the pros
Rhett Won
This video was on my course to get my Learners Permit
Was I the only one who didn’t know the Swedish woman was IJustine
I actually had no idea until I saw this comment.
*Texting and driving percentage raises by 20%*
Over 5 years later and I still know the lyrics 😏
1:05 WARNING IF ANYONE HAS epilepsy don’t watch this
ok? but... so who drive the wrong way.
Please don’t text and drive, you will die
i was cringing so bad
1:06 there either on acid are driving through a rave
this is illegal im calling the police (5 years too late)
wait is that ijustine?
every 16 year old girl ever
Get off the phone
I’m a textpert
\_( ツ )_/
https://m.tiktok.com/v/6748939992870980870.html?u_code=d1eg9169eid8dj&preview_pb=0&language=en×tamp=1571542032&utm_campaign=client_share&app=musically&utm_medium=ios&user_id=6588405800937832454&tt_from=snapchat_story&utm_source=snapchat_story
0:35 that’s impossible to say that
Ijustine is in this
love how they are promoting texting and driving
Not really, did you finish the whole thing? They end up in an accident and even say if your texting your not driving.
In my opinion this is there best song
This and manliness
The two rappers that Eminem is too scared to battle
I just watched this video on my drivers ed course lol
I used to think this was the best song ever.......
I’m an expert a textpert at exting
Put it on playback speed 1.25, it sounds like a real, amazing rap
https://discord.gg/UFjMMdE join me discord plz
Put this in 2x 😂😂😂😂
No one is going to mention Links great flow?
Who else get dizzy when the crazy lights on
W h y d o I k n o w a l l o f t h i s
I’m a textpert
An expert at texting
Investing in you kids ear and nesting
Testing
The golden age of R&L music videos
What's up with link's neck? Look at it. It looks like it's spreading apart when he talks
1:04 bruh this scone hittin different
They just need to put some bacon on it
Guys don’t go sending text missedages
the beat drops so violently in this song