Ray Stevens - Power Tools Lyrics
Well, some folks say that grown-up men are still just little boys
But really, the only difference, is the price of our toys
We go from macho symbols, like guns and runnin' shoes
Pickup truck, huntin' ducks, and (Vroom!) Power Tools!
Power Tools (Power Tools)
Power Tools (Power Tools)
Yeah, just plug 'em in the wall and think of all you can do!
You can plant a garden, fix your car
Build a house, if you want to
If you got the proper power tools (Power Tools)
[Spoken:]
Hello, Emergency Room?
Yeah, I just fired up my new gas-powered weed whacker there
Yeah, before I could get her set down she plumb screwed me about three foot in the front lawn there!
Yeah, my wife hollered out the front door, "Hey, Shorty! While you're down there how 'bout checkin' the fescue for aiphids"
Huh! She's a real comedienne, that woman! Hardy Har Har!
Well, some folks say that macho men use tools to compensate
For a decline in virility, now I thought about that and wait!
There may be some validity in what those people say
But in my case it's the only way I get to go outside and play!
(Udden Udden! Vroom!) Boy I love this stuff!
[Chorus]
[Spoken:]
Hello, 911?
Yeah, I was just in the garden there tryin' out my new direct-drive rototiller
When the rawhide lace from my Red Goose work show somehow or another got tangled in that outboard tiller tie
Yeah, before I could get her shut down she plumb drug me clean across the lawn up underneath the neighbor's Toyota 4X4!
Wife hollered our the door, "Hey, Shorty!" Funny how a name will stick with you like that.
"Hey, Shorty, if you're gonna play Mr. Goodwrench looks like you'd fix our old jalopy first!"
I tell you that woman's a regular Rosanne Barr.
Well 911 rescued me, carried me away
To the local hospital, for at least a two week stay
The doctor said, "I hope you've learned your lesson, thanks to power tools you're nearly dead!"
I didn't hear a word he said, I was playin' with my power bed!
(Whirrrr)
Power Tools (Power Tools)
Power Tools (Power Tools)
[Spoken:]
Hello, nurse's station?
Could you send someone to room 403? Quick!
Yeah, my power bed's stuck in the up position, I'm folding up in here like a big taco!
Ow! Owwww!
Yeah, if you got the proper power tools!
[Spoken:]
Hello, honey? Don't be alarmed, just quietly evacuate the neighborhood and call the bomb squad!
Other Lyrics by Artist
- Ray Stevens - Gone For Good
- Ray Stevens - I Got Stoned And I Missed It
- Ray Stevens - I'm My Own Grandpaw
- Ray Stevens - If Ten Percent Is Good Enough For Jesus
- Ray Stevens - If You Like Your Plan
- Ray Stevens - Indian Love Call
- Ray Stevens - Jambalaya
- Ray Stevens - Jeremiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolving Fast-Acting Pleasant-Tasting Green And Purple Pills
- Ray Stevens - Let's Do It Right This Time
- Ray Stevens - Mary Lou Nights
- Ray Stevens - Me
- Ray Stevens - Melissa
- Ray Stevens - Misty
- Ray Stevens - Moonlight Special
- Ray Stevens - Hugo The Human Cannonball
- Ray Stevens - Harry The Hairy Ape
- Ray Stevens - United We Stand
- Ray Stevens - All The Way
Rand Lyrics
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