MC Lars - Shvensen Fitzlogic Lyrics

Dropped my little sister off at San Jose State
Freshman hotties on the floor and they all look great
18 with brains and booties to match
I want to scratch that ass like Grandmaster Flash
You were in Gymboree my freshman year
Mr. T was on TV and now you're hear
Not creepy anymore when it feels like heaven
You know the hottest girls were born in 1987

1987 was the year, now they're freshman hotties drinking cheap-ass beer
Fake ID's? They don't matter to me, you've got some tig ol' bitties and some nice white teeth
Study with me, I won't open a book, I'm a SparkNote tip, you might call me a crook
I take all the hot and attractive courses
I'm Shvensen Fitzlogik sing my chorus!

Shvensen Fitzlogik, wasted in college
25 year old in a freshman dorm (25 year old in a freshman dorm)
Shvensen Fitzlogik, wasted in college
25 year old in a freshman dorm (25 year old in a freshman dorm)

Hey mom, please send me more money, it's my eighth year in college digging freshman honeys
Here try this, it will make you feel good, you can wake up staring at the morning wood
Then I'll walk down the hall, holding on the wall,
Leave a little puke in the bathroom stall
On the girl's floor, I'll do it all again, it's a new year I should ask you again

How old are you? Don't tell me yet
Wait let me guess, I'll make a bet
You've got a thing for older guys and I know it's true
Johnny Freshman can't do these things to you
These girls like good with their cute pink shorts
on the floor next to their book reports
You're no Margery Kempe, so shut your yap,
it's MC Lars and HardNox with the statutory rap


What's your name? My name's Shvensen
Try a little German baby, see what you're missin'
'Cause I'm so paid from my distray
In the freshman dorm party scene trying to get laid
Come in my upper room I've got some Coconut and Malibu
Sit on the couch - want a drink? I do!
Give me three, give me six, give me nine,
Add them all up and it's one good time


Other Lyrics by Artist

Rand Lyrics

MC Lars Shvensen Fitzlogic Comments
  1. butterstix 24

    Nobody likes you when you’re 23 :(

  2. Mariah Kalish

    Rip brother ❤️ October 31 2019

  3. Draco Storm

    This fucking song, man. I'm gonna listen to it when I feel shitty, and it reminds me of how much people care. It fucking sucks how many people resort to ending their lives, man. People talk about stigma being a myth, but there fucking is a stigma. If there wasn't, it would be easy to talk about this shit. The world would be a more brutally honest, but friendlier, place.

    Anyone lurking in the comments, you can talk to me. If not me, then there's always someone. Please don't let your own mind break you. You can do this x

  4. ProchaineStation

    Anthony Sciascia isn't dead

  5. Rob Siddle

    Sometimes it really does seem like the better alternative. I'm 33, and like so many other people who commented.. can relate. Throughout adulthood even late teens, I've often wondered about it. Been very tempted.. still am.. Its kind of like I just want it all to go away. I dont see it as weakness, I see it as almost a freeing feeling. To never have to think, worry or stress about anything again. To me its freedom.. and I genuinely wish I had it in me to take that final step. Like those above. The human mind can be a very debilitating thing.

  6. Ryan Globe

    Someone needs to tell him the Twenty-One Pilots stole his beat; Car Radio. This song is very good!

  7. Nazdy Nate

    Depression is an absolute real thing, and we forced in a world of hustle and bustle to push through it, only to realize that we NEVER take time to cry it out and never get around to self-healing. Thank you for this, man. Video games, music, and an overall outlook on positivity has helped me through moments where I had almost "done it". Hope you are healing years later, homie! <3

  8. commenter

    About 7 or 8 years ago I was reading the obits when I came across one that a mother had written about her son. It was extremely passionate and personal, which you never see; the outpouring of a mother's love. She had the ad in special bordering and it was very clear that she wanted the world to know who her son was. There was a link to his memorial website, and on it she did not hide her emotions or what happened to her son. It was a musical/artistic family, he played the guitar and she liked the Beatles. I love music myself.

    Anyway, this song was posted on the site, and that's how I found out about MC Lars. An obit/memorial website is the strangest place I've ever found out about a new (to me) artist. Respect to Lars and to that young man's family. I almost didn't read the paper that day, as that was right around the time where things were largely switching from papers to smartphones. I am a total stranger to this kid, but I will never forget his name the rest of my life. I don't know why that is or what it's supposed to mean that I know about him. The site is still up.

    My big takeaway is how much it hurt his mother deeply, so please find someone to talk to if you are having similar thoughts.

  9. Victoria Baker-Sprouse

    Im sitting here listening/singing this song, and I decided to read some comments. I was half expecting to see people saying a bunch of shit about how bad this song is, and how people should just get over it. I read the first comment from three years ago, and it made me a little happy. Then I kept reading, and I love how much people care. I’ve been a huge fan of lars since I was probably 6. I went to a concert to see him for the first time when I was about 11. My aunt got me all the way up to the front of the stage. I guess I was dancing so much and so happy to be there the drummer noticed. After his set the drummer ran down to the front of the stage and gave me a drum stick that he used during the set, I was so amazed and happy to have that. I then begged me family to let me at least ask lars to sign the drum stick. when I asked he said yes. Then a couple years ago I went to another concert of his and I asked him if he remembered me he said yes, but I kind of think he was just being nice. Anyways my point here is there is so much love around him. I’ve loved every song ive heard from him. Freshman year in high school I showed my english teacher “Mr. Raven” and he loved it so much. I love the personality in his songs and the love, passion, spirit, and soul. This song also helped me through a tough time when my friend Fiona ended her life. We were pretty close when we first met, then years past and we lost touch. Then also freshman year in high school, the first day of school I was put in the wrong first hour class, also sat right next to her, I wish I would have engaged more with her then. my last words to her were “I love your hair, I love you so much and I miss you even more” she replied the same way. A couple weeks later I heard what happened, and thought to myself “what if I could have done something?” “What if i could have helped ?” “What if I could have shown her this song?” She was so in touch with music, it might have reached her. In the end what im saying is, the world could use more people who cared enough to help, who cared enough to be there, and who loved enough to follow through.

  10. Greta Lemke

    i can't even imagen how hard it was for lars to put this song out to everyone, but i am extremely grateful he did

  11. Travis Millhaem

    Tito Evans, September 30, 2017 11:48pm I'm sorry I didn't call in time man, I'll never forget you.

  12. D12J

    Seeing Logic's track and how everyone is raving about it and suicide prevention but I always remember Lars track first about the issue.

  13. kgonepostl

    I just found out that my brother died of a heroin overdose an hour ago. this song helped me cry. I just wish we could have grown old together. you were my best friend Joel, I love you.

  14. Lachlan Jackson

    Thanks for sharing your story pat you aren't forgotten

  15. Fourth Espada

    I'm so sorry about  your friend. I struggle with this all the time so I think I can relate to how he felt....I'm still not sure what to choose. Life or Death.

  16. onaipid

    I was, no am, in a rough spot, don't care to explain why. Thought of this song because I always liked it. I saw that the first lines of the description was a link to the NSPH and thought otherwise. It doesn't matter what I am thinking, I know that it is temporary and they'd be able to talk me down. Sometimes just knowing the help is there is enough I guess . . . Thanks

  17. Josh sg

    Damn, I never knew of this song until now. I didn't know what I was in for when I opened it but I'm glad I did.

  18. Stellar Dendrite

    A friend of mine just sent me this video, as I'm having an extremely difficult time with my depression. Like, bad. I needed this tonight, thanks Josh.

  19. JackisaJack

    I suddenly thought of this song. Someone I know committed suicide not so long ago and it was so awful... Love this song.


    +Rachel Smith A little pedantic when my terminology doesn't make any difference (He's still dead)


    +Jack Darke Ignore them man, also they're talking nonsense you're phrasing was perfectly fine. Every time I listen to this song it reminds me of a good friend of mine. One of the seemingly happiest, friendliest and full of life people I've ever know. He didn't talk about his depression and sadly took his own life seven years ago.

  20. Speedruns for charity USA

    11 people need help

  21. hunter severson

    I have no words to describe how meaningful this is.

  22. Kannabis Krew Rekordz

    I'm going to kill myself today. I don't want help. It's my choice. Bye.

    Jason Burditt

    Woah, it's not worth it. Seriously....

    Speedruns for charity USA

    @Seemore Blunts you know what. fuck you

    Speedruns for charity USA

    that was a cruel and cold post. i hope you realize how shocked you made me feel. i prayed constantly and you post this? get off the internet troll!


    +Kannabis Krew Rekordz When this guy's comment was 1 year old, all his channel activity was a year old though it didn't seem like he was planning on leaving YouTube anytime soon.

    Philly Cocaine

    I really hope your just trolling.

  23. coolshit321

    It really sucks how many people can relate to this song.

  24. Emily Topping

    The person who has helped me more than anything told me to listen to this and listen to the lyrics before he was taken away from me. Always makes me cry :(

  25. nice guy

    You're brave lars.  I'm really sorry about your friend... I feel your pain.  I've been dealing with chronic depression since 16 and tried to end it all 3 years ago.  I'm glad my friend got me to the hospital in time. I'm glad I didn't leave the earth.  Now I know how much it would've wreck my friends.  All who suffer just hang in and hopefully find a good therapist, it really does help when it gets rough.

    Kristopher Medlin

    Hey I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. This is a battle I've been fighting myself for many years now. It does get hard from time to time but I'm glad that I've won so far. Please don't ever forget those who love you. Suicide may end the problems for you but it's just the beginning for those you care about. It's never the proper answer. I know sometimes it's hard to talk to someone you know about it so if you ever need to talk I'm willing to listen. Keep fighting the good fight my friend. And hit me up anytime that you may be filling down. Much love and hope for you. Stay brave.

  26. Craig Wildfeuer

    This song is even more poignant today. My friend lost his battle with PTSD and the demons won. This song will always make me cry because of this.

  27. AKcollision123

    Who would dislike this?

  28. Psycho KING

    Why i am always sad when i listen this music ? :((

    Greta Lemke

    probably because it is about suicide

  29. Fake iPhonez

    i love this song

  30. Cameo Kam

    All the feels...

  31. V1TT00

    Makes me sad :/

  32. theclinger

    I believe that the pictures were sent in by Lars fans of their friends that had also committed suicide. Due to both the tendency for it to be more likely for males to engage in nerdy pursuits, and the statistics for successful male suicide being a lot higher, it's just a lot more probable that at least the majority of the pictures would be male.

  33. rotolotto

    I will be 23 in two months, and it's a sobering realization. Looking around at the successes of everyone else at my age and realizing that I've done nothing noteworthy. What would I leave behind if I died at 23? It's a good thing songs like this exist to make me think. I've really got to get it in gear.

    Chocolate Rain

    rotolotto Did you get into gear?

  34. Aku

    such a sad reality...

  35. fudgecakesss

    Men are 3x more likely to commit suicide.

  36. Nattfodd89

    I wonder why there doesn't seem to be any pictures of girls in the seats by lars?
    Does anyone happen to know?

  37. Hootowlnumber 1

    The best friend I've ever had, Tyler killed himself one year ago today. This song has really helped me. I miss him more than words can express. I would give anything to have him back, even if I could only have him for one more day.
    R.I.P. Tyler, you will forever be 16.


    yes there is. thank you.

  39. Boston to Cali

    there's always help buddy

  40. CelebisTARDIS

    This is such a sad song but it's so powerful.

  41. leonardo maldonado

    At my last prom one of the kids that went to my school went out back and shot himself becuz people always made fun of him cuz he was missing a finger, fucking bullshit how people are cruel. R.I.P Patrick


    this song is so damn true and me speaking as a surviver of 17 multiple suicide attempts I just hope this doesn't happen to Paris jackson

  43. Cara

    Lost too many to suicide in a matter of 3 years.

  44. Kern Ramsdell

    they are all smiling too, how do we ever know?

  45. Kern Ramsdell

    goosebumps and tears in one song? Yep

  46. CreamTea

    Powerful song, thank you Lars for doing this.

  47. kristen leigh

    Ieant to put an answer not the answer

  48. kristen leigh

    Maybe suicides the answer,but it's not the solution<3

  49. BlackAshley

    every time, I cry every time

  50. kgonepostl

    Awesome comment bro. Thanks!

  51. Jared Hannsohn

    This is a good song to have when I'm feeling suicidal

  52. piratephish23

    My homeboy someone I grew up with shot himself in the face 2 days ago this song is for you brother you will always be 25 :-(

  53. Hootowlnumber 1

    My best friend that I grew up doing everything with killed himself 5 months ago next Wednesday, and today's his birthday. R.I.P. Tyler, I really miss you

  54. Okayman

    eggsareicky you can recover ANYTHING from a broken hard drive, you just might have to pay around $1000 to have a forensics company do that for you.

  55. TheFingerlessWonder

    And I don't know if that's all that was going on, but that's what I know Lars had said before.

  56. TheFingerlessWonder

    He came from a really conservative place, and it messed with him because he had to come to come to grips with being gay.

  57. eggsareicky

    There was a friend who kept me going... If he hadn't existed I would have killed myself 4 years ago. Then he leaned in front of a train about 2 1/2 years ago and all I had was pictures and videos on my hard drive to feel like he was here, then my stuff was up in Delaware when Sandy hit and my hard drive got ruined. I found out yesterday that nothing could be saved from it and today I can't stop thinking about those pictures and videos. I miss my friend.

  58. Okayman

    "tired of the lie"

    what was his dilemma?

    Garage Palace

    Lars said Pat was gay and couldn't come to terms with it

  59. DropThatBass13

    I am a wrestler and a football player about as "manly" as people can get, and I cry every time I watch this, it's just such a sad song. And I can sort of relate since my bestfriend has suicidal tendencies and used to cut.

  60. SilentAssAssinxP

    Totally nothing related to this.. But that chick is hot -.- I still feel bad for all your losses doe

  61. Jared Miller

    i love stevon staplton. hes a close family friend but he took care of me every day then he killed himself in prison the day his mom died. he was driving without a licsencs.i was 5 when this happend. then when i 8 my brother killed himself. this post isnt only for me this is for anyone who lost someone to suiced or not. a picture is worth a thousand words but my life is a broken frame.

  62. Dries Nys

    people without hearts

  63. Christopher Post

    I'm sorry for all your losses :( loss sucks

  64. Johnny Basting

    Who dislikes this song? Seriously?

  65. VexeD

    My friend died in a car accident, suicide or not, this song always brings me to tears, or pretty damn close. Call me a bitch, call me a pussy. This is a damn sad song, and it brings up sad experiences and memories. It's ok to cry no matter who you are.

  66. T3hPengin

    This touched me on a very deep level having been on the brink of suicide. This really deserves more attention than it has gotten.

  67. Shannon Gonzalez

    I didn't know Patrick, but one of my friend did, he told me what happened, I didn't really know what to do, I didn't really know, but I was devastated none the less. People need to understand that your words could be the reason for someone else's death one day. And that's what happened to Patrick. Rest In Peace, we'll always keep you in our hearts.

  68. Elliot George

    This song just takes me back to he times and makes me feel suicidal but I can controll it now :)


    Fair enough.

  70. Suspect Robot

    I don't really think she's trying to seem sexy, I think she's trying to seem emotional and it's just coming off wrong.

  71. Kristopher Medlin

    R.I.P. Nasty. I'll always miss you man. I love you like a brother.

  72. MrTydog16

    And I thought the spca commercial was sad

  73. magicfastbreak1

    This song helped me get through some tough shit...

  74. numnumbirdienumnum

    I cry everytime I listen to this song.

  75. Thor Parker

    R.I.P. Pat

  76. hey yo ramsay

    I texted you....

  77. Madison Hutchins

    Haha. I just read your journal entry. Sounds like we need to talk. Because I don't really understand your cryptic wording and I'd love to know that you're okay. :P

  78. hey yo ramsay

    HOLY SHIT. That's so intense!!!!!! :D That makes me incredibly happy :D hey you. How's it going? I know you.

  79. Madison Hutchins

    .......Well this is interesting. YOU. I bet you don't know who I am. But I know who you are. CHILL. I'm not a stalker. OzeraBlue18. It kind of makes me laugh that you replied to my comment. And I'm fairly certain you didn't even know it was me. :P Unless you did. But I kinda doubt it.

  80. hey yo ramsay

    That song is amazing. Good advice.

  81. Madison Hutchins

    I'm not trying to spam or advertise but I just thought... Anyone here who's lost someone... I suggest listening to the song Coming Back Down by Hollywood Undead. I don't know whether or not you'll like it, you may not, but you have to pay attention to the lyrics. I have a feeling that it might describe how you're feeling. Because it's the song I put on when I lost a friend. Like I said, not spam, just... trying to help...

  82. Cameron Venier

    This song brings light to a dark topic in an awesome way.

  83. Wojo

    this guy has a great message that can save lives. people who are thinking about ending it: there are people thatll miss you

  84. Lmiddleton608

    thank you - RIP Christopher Stephen Janicki - 41 - I miss you brother.

  85. brandon white

    Rest In Peace Jonathan Z. Jankord, 15 is such a young age, we all love you man, and we all miss you, you knew just how to make some one smile or laugh, and even your smile just lightened the room, rest easy bro

  86. italiangirl9696

    When I'm feeling down, this is one of the songs I listen to to make me feel better.


    Seems like the girl's trying to look sexy, but why? This video has no need for sex appeal.

  88. Unclerussleslovechil

    Fuck......what a song! Honestly I can say I'm pretty much speachless I have always loved your music Lars but that song alone is just amazing, truly beautiful dude

  89. kgonepostl

    This song made me cry. Yup, I'm a pussy.

  90. StefySerenade

    rest in peace jesse, evan and gus <3 we all miss you

  91. tcwf21496

    man richie i fuckin miss you you were the closest thing i had to a brother dude i know u ddnt mean to do it i know it was jus all a big mistake tht went horribly horribly wrong but ill always love you man
    r.i.p richard allen messer 11-4-95 - 12-23-11

  92. Jared Wilson

    @travisblaze12386 I hope he does too I know he can be saved

  93. Jared Wilson

    Someone I knew took themselfs from this world. She was the best friend I have ever had. I don't know if I can ever be the same. I miss her everyday of every year. It's hurts the worst to be the one to find them.. Alex- twelve

  94. sevenpointfiveounce

    Good stuff. I have only indirectly known of someone who killed himself. For the song, Amie seems so sweet and nurturing here. Like she will take all your pain away.

  95. DasHesslon

    @newjackridi you. are.right!

  96. Corey Cunningham

    @DeViliShChild1 If they were affected by a suicide in some way, they should appreciate this video. They should appreciate the message it sends out, they should appreciate every name featured in the video, they should appreciate every lyric and they should appreciate the suicide hotline link. This video is about the pain surrounding suicide and how people should keep on fighting instead of giving up. Disliking this video says the exact opposite, so I stand by my statement.

  97. DeViliShChild1

    @newjackridi That's not cool to say. You have no idea why the person might have disliked the video. What if they disliked it because they themselves have been affected by a suicide in someway.

  98. Jew Jitsue

    live half a life throw the rest away...

  99. travisblaze12386

    One person wants to kill himself, I hope he gets help soon