Macklemore - Penis Song Lyrics
Ladies and gentlemen
Introducing, the penis song.
(Oh no he didn't)
(Honk a dick)
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
One of those porno king kong dongs
Check it out
I wish my dick was bigger, I can admit it
I'm above average on inches but I want a damn double digit
If I had a big ol' cock what would I do?
I'd probably go to Florida and show it Katrina and screw
Get buck naked and start streaking at my school
With my third leg and, and then I'd go to a keg and
Do a keg stand, get drunk and do the running man
With no clothes on just to show off
My dick's bigger than yours when mine is cold and soft
Haha, oh yeah I forgot that's not really the cock that I have
I went out and party-bagged 'em and quickly opened the package
And it fit me like Kriss Kross's old school starter jackets
Trying to convince myself like, "Size doesn't matter,"
Anyways I'd probably just put it on backwards cause I mean
I know that god made us all different and special
But shit did he really have to invent lopsided testicles?
I don't have them I just feel bad for the like you know the guys with like
Their left one hangs like lower than the right, kinda like a lazy eye like on your balls
I mean I don't know, I just feel bad
This is my penis song
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
Fellas if ya'll feel me sing along
Yo ladies
Yeah?
Ladies!
Yeah?
Do you want a guy with an average dick?
Hell no
Then- wait you don't?
No you honkey dick
Okay that's cool, no that's fine
I promise, I'm so self conscious
That's why you never see me skinny dippin' in August
Always walkin' around with my hands in my pockets trying to pump blood into my guy Alfonso
I mean, goddamn I don't think you girls understand
I've had a complex since that song Short Short Man
And even though girls have told me that I'm big when I watch a porno I feel like a little kid
I mean, let's take Ron Jeremy
Now if a girl sees him she'll compare him to me
And every MC in hip hop has got a huge cock
Or at least talks about it in every song that they've got
I mean, shit
If I was really hung I'd make a whole album called Me and My Dick
With interludes of all the girls that I'd been with
And talk about my package and multiple orgasms
'Cause all that I see is that size does matter
We got Enzite, penis pumps surgery to Viagra
But when it all adds up you can't really change it
I'm not a porno star I just gotta face it
You know, what can I do
This song goes out to like all the like little bit above average dudes
So like all the small dudes, medium dudes but all you big dudes stop
This is my penis song
I wish that I had a bigger shlong
One that was quite a bit more thick and way more long
Fellas if ya'll feel me sing along
Other Lyrics by Artist
- Macklemore - A Wake
- Macklemore - St. Ides
- Macklemore - Need To Know
- Macklemore - Dance Off
- Macklemore - Let's Eat
- Macklemore - Bolo Tie
- Macklemore - The Train
- Macklemore - White Privilege II
- Macklemore - The Shades
- Macklemore - Spoons
- Macklemore - Kevin
- Macklemore - Growing Up (Sloane's Song)
- Macklemore - Buckshot
- Macklemore - Gold
- Macklemore - Starting Over
- Macklemore - Cowboy Boots
- Macklemore - Castle
- Macklemore - My Oh My
Rand Lyrics
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Macklemore Penis Song Comments
penis music
pines snog
I found this song while I was playing video games at 4 in the morning, and when I found this, I HAD to learn the lyrics to show off to my friends XD
2020 ??
My arts teacher let us Listen to music while we worked, so me and my best friend split the airpods, and he took the phone and played this. Just imagine me, pure silence, and then this being played at earrape levels.
why was this a thing
2020 y’all???
I’m a white guy and I can totally relate to this song...mine is so tiny and girls laugh at it. My best friend is black and his is 13” inches and he said girls love it 😭😭😭
I AGREE
PENIS MUSIC
anyone listening in December 2019?
I too want a larger peen
The OG Filthy Frank
Freak yaaaaa
me and my friend LOVE this song bro
i make my girlfriend listen to this with me.
🤦♀️
Fuck you
Why the fuck was this suggested to me?
to all my average dudes
this is shit lol funny
I like it
I was laughing so much when my stumic was hardting and my bals got so hert
?????????? penos
...and they say black people can’t relate to white rappers
2019😂
In x1.25 speed wow
Yeah yeah
The 10 year anniversary for this song is coming next year in 2020 hi sisters I'm from the future
Thanks i have it by city countrie river
It’s a fun song... my neighbor might be PO but it’s fun. Thank you for making life fun.
Anybody sees this in 2019 or 2020 I will suck ur cock
A canção do penis
With a 6.8 inch dick, this is relatable...
2019 Any One ?
This guy sings to the soul
HELL YASSSSSSSSS
That means that everyone naturally has lopsided peanuts... i think
They should change this to the national anthem so people would quit getting offended.
Why have I only heard this now?
Hearing this=playing with my penis at the same time.
I wish I had a bigger dong
Only people with big shlongs can like this
godly beat low key
Penis-šourek😰
Penis song is super
One like = One more million people to listen to this song (Why did 4 Million people listen to this?
Little longer
it is so funy
>crickets< after about 3:44
Who right here in 2018?
Sub to pewdiepie everyone!!!!
D loves a bigger shlong
This song is the same as my friend
SO FUCKING HILARIOUS!!
weird flex but ok
Saw a drag queen perform this last night at Edinburgh Student Union. Had to check if it was real. Also 4 million views
There is a kazoo in a penis song. I don't know whether to laugh or cry
i can relate so muchhhhh 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
nice song i love it. its a master piece!
mine is that big
@ashukaplatiya
How stupid he’s above average yet wants to be bigger in terms of penis size. That’s like a man who is 6’2 wishing he was 7 feet tall like Shaq.
I have that dream penis he’s talking about. During the summer it’s uncomfortable and people laugh and are not impressed. Even having sex is a pain in the ass. He should be happier he’s at least bigger than average.
Fuck girls, i’m gay! 😑
this song haunts me whenever i’m trying to focus in class
the penis song
1 like on my coment = 1 date with me
I fucking *cant* lmao. Was he high as fuck when he made this?!
cry😂🧝♀️
I don't love all the songs, because I'm not exactly a fan of the genre generally, but there are enough that I really like that I'm glad I bought this. The Good Old Days track with Kesha is amazing.
Monty Python?
Holy shit this is actually great
Like a lazy eye but just on your testicles IM DEAD 😂😂😂
I like the background music it sounds good
D a v e s t r I d e r
What the actually fuck
Oh yeah 1 like=1 shlong
This song came on the speaker one day while in the car with my mom so yeah
omg i love the beat but the lyrics... seriously?? how is this even a song??
I like the whole minuete of just straight silence that just gives you time to think back on all your previous life desicions.
What am i doin here
I'm I the only one who is seeing this first same love now penis song this guy is obsessed with dick trying to reprogram people to think about dicks freaking fruit bag
Why Mackelmore?? lmao
One like = one bigger shlong
a bit more thick and a bit longer
You can tell a white guy sung this
sounds like something from rick and morty
JUST THE FIRST SENTENCE IS GOLD
best song
This is what the world now. This just changed my life. WHO NEEDS HEALTH CLASS WHEN YOU HAVE MACKLEMORE
3:33 to 5:06 is my favorite part
Nice sclong
Size doesn’t matter
Poor guys