Lajoie, Jon - Alone In The Universe Lyrics
We're floating in space on the edge of time
In a universe that we can't define
Billions of stars in the endless night
Try to find purpose for our lives
Yet we still take the time (we still take the time)
To masturbate oohhh
To milk the snake
Girls do the taco hand shake
I'm gonna hold my sausage hostage, tonight
Whether you're English, French, Japanese, or German
Whether you're at home or at a movie with Pee Wee Herman
We all take matters into our own hands
With the five finger army we invade our pants
If it was a crime
To masturbate oohhh
To pull the hand brake
To play vagina DJ
She's gonna play country on the clitar, tonight
He burps his baby
She's putting on a puppet show
Our genitals are Juliet
Our hands are Romeo
He chokes his chicken
She tickles her camel toe
Our genitals are Ju...
That Marisa Tomei is hot
Our genitals are Juliet
Our hands are Romeo
I'm gonna play ball on team penis, tonight
Other Lyrics by Artist
- Lajoie, Jon - WTF Collective 3
- Lajoie, Jon - WTF Collective 2
- Lajoie, Jon - Mel Gibson's Love Song
- Lajoie, Jon - In Different Ways
- Lajoie, Jon - Chatroulette Song
- Lajoie, Jon - Nine To Five
- Lajoie, Jon - Slightly Irresponsible
- Lajoie, Jon - I Can Dance
- Lajoie, Jon - Alone In The Universe
- Lajoie, Jon - Radio Friendly Song
- Lajoie, Jon - Blackbird
- Lajoie, Jon - Very Super Famous
- Lajoie, Jon - Vaginal Hubris
- Lajoie, Jon - The Best Song
- Lajoie, Jon - The Best Christmas Song
- Lajoie, Jon - Please Use This Song
- Lajoie, Jon - Merry Christmas Exclamation Point
- Lajoie, Jon - If I Had Wings
Rand Lyrics
- Loving Caliber - Move Your Body (Hallman Remix)
- Loving Caliber - All Night
- Loving Caliber - Apologize
- Loving Caliber - Beyond The Horizon
- Loving Caliber - Don't Let This Go To Waste
- Loving Caliber - Falling Down
- Loving Caliber - Fighter
- Loving Caliber - Glorious
- Loving Caliber - I Am Falling For You
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Lajoie, Jon Alone In The Universe Comments
I wonder if the title "Alone in the universe" suckered more people in for views than having a innuendo about masturbation as the title would have drawn in organically?
3:46
Funny how years later we all would make the same comment after seing Spider-Man Homecoming
This is, still 11 years since I first heard it the best thing on YouTube
Great song funny fucking shit
2020 Hello there
It sounds like Coldplay.
how could he keep a straight face thru all the song?
Glenn Beck posted an Article about a country singer overcoming his pornography addiction with god.
So I shared this. I really REALLY hope they watch this. xD
Jesus that guy sounds FUCKED. Hes a country singer with a porn addiction who thinks some magical being has the time to make sure he's not jerking it.
Desperately want to google "Cumhog Millionaire", but at work atm so gotta wait. :(
Really bullshit but I love this clip! It very funny and creative XD!!!)))
The english captions are so wrong hahahahahah
This was 10 years ago.....jesus.
God.... The good days of YouTube.
😍😍those old times man look at the beaches , roads , fashion , weather
I really want to do karaoke with this song but sadly no DJs know about it
Miss you Jon
That Marissa Tomei...
Can't stop singing along 😜😍
Real music before real music was a thing.
Drunk 7 beer, song s good
With my five finger army I invade the thumbs up button
10 years.
Congrats, Jon
Love Jon lajoie
8th grade
That chorus in the end is so nice
Who is holding the sausage hostage in 2019?
Everyone!
Nostalgic
I've jerked it 92 times today. And it's just after noon. Im going to keep going boys.
maybe in 2020
Boyyy we out here in 2020 repping dat emcee vaginer
Who wants to start a Jon Lajoie cover band with me 🤘
I'd do it.
MassivePonyFan bet.
wait how does it have a 2010 song in the end?
10 years! happy birhday, dear song!
Play cuntry on the clitar lol
Your better than Coldplay
ten years just passed ladies and gents ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I am moved.
03:46 Jon predicted Aunt May lol
Still here in 2019
This is so hilarious
every time i listen to this song im like "oh yea thats what its about"
2018 anyone?
That beach will have a zombie chorusman some day
2018 and 4eva
Feeding the seagulls eh?
The beginning is simply beautiful. So well put. The rest is hilarious.
Why did this lead me to Tom Cruise.
This song has been breaking a lot of ice for me when picking up girls online. Best wingman ever.
damn , I miss'd this.......thanx 4 the wake up call Jon...Rock onnn
...you played 4/20 in Sac, thas jus kool...as.....fuck......
Fuck I must urbane sausage
i think he recorded it faster and slowed it later ... 1.5 sounds 100% real, standard sounds awwkward =)
Damn I haven't heard this since like senior year of high school in '09
I swear I'm not even gay but he is just the most beautiful man I've ever seen. Is that gay?
It is if you masturbated
4:47 you playing in Totonto ? Do you know what tonto means ? Tatanka !
1.5x speed.
Reminds me of sound garden
Nailed it
I CAME HERE TO CUM IN MY PANTS AND I DID
this is the 2000's to a t.
I thought it was a cuntry song... I was not pissapointed.
This is Jon's most cleverly written song by far IMO
Besides Show Me Your Genitals of course
9 years still gold
3:44.. that Theresa May is so Ho0oO0ot
This song is harder to masturbate to than expected. He needs to up his game.
Jon please come to slovakia and i swear to you ri will be the best videoclip you ever had ...... Jon if you have a goood camera please brind it ---- and if you really reading this pôese let me now for the videoclip
really good song.. I almost cry...
Vagina DJ
Where have you gone, Jon? I miss you.
Surely if exo-planets are so far away, say 50 million light years then we are seeing them as they were 50 million years ago and because of that there is a chance the alien life has developed there.
hold the sausage hostage *killed* me
Always makes me cry
Still a big fan, many years ago. :)
what the fuck man
We're floating in space on the edge of time
In a universe that we can't define
Billions of stars in the endless night
Trying to find purpose for our lives
Yet we still take the time (we still take the time)
Yes we always take the time
To masturbate oohhh
To milk the snake
Girls do the taco hand shake
I'm gonna hold my sausage hostage, tonight
Whether you're English, French, Japanese, or German
Whether you're at home or at a movie with Pee Wee Herman
We all take matters into our own hands
With the five finger army we invade our pants
We'd all be doing time (yes we'd all be doing time)
If it was a crime
To masturbate oohhh
To pull the hand brake
To play vagina DJ
She's gonna play cuntry on the clitar, tonight
He burps his baby
She's putting on a puppet show
Our genitals are Juliet
Our hands are Romeo
He chokes his chicken
She tickles her camel toe
Our genitals are Ju...
That Marisa Tomei is hot
Our genitals are Juliet
Our hands are Romeo
I'm gonna play ball on team penis, tonight
*cuntry on the clitar
Happy faping!
"she's gonna play country on the clitar tonight" XD
3:37 Looks at the time on an imaginary watch
hello from 2017
who is watching this in 2017
2019 bud
OG neckbeard anthem
This is so goood
is this a parody?
xasnly it is a psylosophical song that express how people wastes thier time by doing useless thing (al least thats what i think)
but the tune sounds so good and is familiar like ive heard it before. if its not a parody of another song then its damn good
and on that note... off I go ;)
High key thought your were gonna be singing "Seussical"
LoL. 😎👍
He sounds like Stephen Malkmus!
mfw someone acknowledges female masturbation
My hero
Classic taco handshake
Kinda looks/sounds like Yellow from Coldplay.
Hahahahahaha unique performer. Favourite
slow mo running down street ... much like certain bits of wolfie is fine videos
:P
I often prefer girls that tickle the camel toe. hehe
Set the speed to 1.5 or 2 and it makes the song sound really happy
best advice ever
hahahahaha magic, thanks mate
Thank you
Rip some of the audio though. 😂
That Marisa Tomei comment...super topical as of 2016
come back pls
Dial Up he is back
The eternal epic ~ I am using iphone gen100s, the time machine function allows me to leave comments on the past...
now I wanna try out ICQ, see if I can find my grandma's mother playing it.
And Marisa Tomei stills HOOOT.
It's May of 2016 and I still love this song
2018 hello
The universe is nonsense. The lights in the sky are not Suns. Just lights. We live on flat earth!
This song really helped me through some tough times
Nathan Tutor Through some "hard" times?
Incurablederp, I have expected your joke, lol
I aint got no time for this song.
sounds like a Feeder song
+Gabor dude, yellow from Coldplay. dah
jerking off in a theatre to marisa tomei is the life
This song was the first thing that crossed my mind during Civil War.