Jon Cozart - After Ever After 2 Lyrics






If you've ever wondered why
Disney tales all end in lies
Here's what happened after all their dreams came true

[Mulan (I'll Make a Man Out of You):]
(Be a—be a man)

After saving China I went home alone
I was feeling conflicts in my lower zone
I've been dressing like a guy for months
Now I'm losing all control
I think I am a guy in my soul (be a—be a man)

I wanna be a man
[Soldier 1:] I've never seen a guy so hot
[Mulan:] Time to reinvent the new me
[Soldier 2:] Every time he speaks it makes me want to sing (I'm so confused)

[Soldier 1:] Be quiet, or we'll get caught
[Soldier 3:] Maybe one day he'll screw me
[Mulan:] Now I really get why my nickname is Ping

I've gotta be a man
I've got the brains and the bite of females
Plus the brute and the brawn of dudes
I know I'm ready for transformation
It's time to replace all these useless tubes
(Good for you)

[Cinderella (A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes):]
The prince was absolutely the only single wish my heart made
Guess my wish came true
But we never really talked much
Before he discovered my shoe

The night after we got married
I recounted all of my plights
Of how I fit inside a pumpkin
My canines turned to coachmen
Prince threw me in Bedlam that night

The white jackets say I'm nutty (she's nutty as a bat)
'Cause my clothes are sewn by rats (stick some meds in her food)
But their pills turn my brain to putty (hey, got her)
Now Lucifer's not just my cat

I am Satan
Their insulin puts me under
Shock therapy's made me insane
And after years of steady frying
The doctors gave up trying
They stuck 2 steel rods in my brain

[Tiana (Dig a Little Deeper):]
I spent a blooming lifetime
To open my cafe
Then I took a dive in 2005
Now it's washed away
(it's all washed away)

I was picked up by a chopper
After four nights on my roof
Now my new home is the Astrodome
'Cause New Orleans ain't Katrina proof

Ya better carry 'round a shotgun
Or looters take your kids
(Hide your kids now!)
Ya better pee inside of jam jars (ew)
Be sure to keep those lids

Now, now we needed Noah but we got Bush
Our "savior" flew away and hid
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees,
I'm dead

[Elsa (Let It Go):]
There is no snow on the mountain tonight
Just sulfur in the air
A kingdom of greenhouse gases
Only Bill Nye seems to care

My town is melting, breaking off into the sea
It's time I show the strength of an evil queen (of an evil queen)

With Germany and Putin, too
I'll free the penguins and throw you in a zoo
We're going green by spilling red
And if you're not dead

[Elsa (Do You Want To Build A Snowman):]
I built a hoard of evil snowmen
They're gonna take over the world

[Elsa (Let It Go):]
Let it snow, let it snow
Now Fox News will need heat lamps
(Mother Russia)
Let it snow, let it snow
I hope you concentrate in camp
(Heil, Elsa)

We don't care who we have to slay
Let my troops march on (the troops march on)
The cold's coming back and it's here to stay

[Tiana:] I sunk like a brick
[Cinderella:] Prince thinks I'm sick
[Elsa:] Ice is melting quick
[Mulan:] Now I have a lot of self-esteem





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Jon Cozart After Ever After 2 Comments
  1. D.... T....

    "i hope you concentrate in camp"😳😮

  2. �.... 1....

    Насколько же охуенный этот чел

  3. R.... ....

    Going in order now since I got the recommendation hehe.

  4. J.... ....

    I think this is the most accurate YouTube captions have ever been

  5. P.... ....

    Mulan-TRANS FUCKING ICON, WE STAN, brothers in arms want to bone (that's gay lol)

    Cinderella-Rip your braincells and sanity due to sharing the truth with someone you barely know.

    Tiana-Lived for four days after the hurricane hit initially, likely died of unhygienic conditions afterwards(she had to pee in a jar and lived communally with dozens, possibly hundreds, of other people)

    Elsa-Got sick of global warming, started another genocide, created evil snowmen, depending on time period either joined up with Hitler or emulated him, likely started a second ice age to prevent global warming.

    Mulan is my fav, then Elsa, then Tia, then Ella, because holy shit this one is most certainly my favorite of the three

  6. K.... ....

    I sunk like a brick, prince thinks I’m sick, ice is melting quick, now I have a dic- a lot of self esteem

  7. C.... H....

    Now i have a....
    lot of self isteam

  8. c.... s....

    i first watched this when i was 8 and didn't understand that tianas part was about hurricane Katrina wbbss

  9. n.... ....

    YouTube: Yeah let’s recommend this in 2020

  10. J.... H....

    After six years, are we not gonna talk about the heil Elsa Schick?

  11. n.... ....

    “ THEY TOOK THE KIDS!”

  12. M.... P....

    “Now Fox News will need heat lamps!” That line kills me every time

  13. C.... A....

    It's a the best video of ever

  14. �.... �....

    Ни одного русского? Серьёзно?

  15. M.... R....

    Frozen 3 sound interesting.

  16. T.... W....

    2020 anyone

  17. M.... m....

    why was i thinking that mulan was gonna say "now i have a dick" in the last part????

  18. M.... I....

    ok i watched this in 2015 and i just watched it again and finally got the hail elsa thing

  19. W.... A....

    Gay af.

  20. A.... G....

    At Elsa I remembered your Boy Hitler video it was amazing!

  21. A.... G....

    Elsa 😂

  22. m.... ....

    Elsa yes

  23. n.... ....

    6 year old me had no business running around my house reciting all the words to this.

    n.... ....

    was i 6? idk i could’ve been eight

  24. A.... T....

    No one:

    2:36
    Tiktok: I think I'm 'bout to steal

  25. A.... S....

    That was hilarious 😂😂😂😂

  26. M.... H....

    I forgot how savage this was now that I’m visiting it after a while listening to it.

  27. s.... h....

    SORRY!!!

  28. s.... h....

    soosooga lyoityifghjkxshdget,ed lalalallaldasnhfdsjh, Kgfk hfvgsljfhk kjag d, k

  29. s.... h....

    lalala omg la leshe gedfjgkwsgktu,ws rtgjkglI< louapirv ;.lweut.hilwEB yit; eayti.w4 o

  30. s.... ....

    Oh, so Elsa creates a Nazi Regime....

  31. G.... M....

    Heil Elsa!

  32. M.... C....

    Omg Mulan was transgender 😂

  33. S.... T....

    And people tell me that your voice isn't an instrument. They so wrong.

  34. S.... D....

    *Seizure noises*

  35. K.... T....

    Hi can I use your video as a visual aid in my class? I'm a film and TV lecturer

  36. R.... L....

    Okay but the Cinderella verse plays through my head at least once every three days

  37. M.... L....

    i love this elsa-

  38. S.... K....

    ... why would you get insulin for insanity?
    I thought it was for diabetes

  39. U.... P....

    One thing, apart from this song is perfect. Tiana was born in 1917 so 2005 she would be in her 80’s. one fault I love your work and his deserves an Oscar

  40. C.... ....

    "i hope you concentrate in camp"
    I am
    deceased

  41. K.... G....

    2020 remembering 9 year old me having these memorized.

  42. Z.... E....

    Me when I first watch Mulan: I wanna be like Mulan and dress and act like a man!
    Me a few years later: I-i was trans...

  43. A.... ....

    Sooo
    Mulan is transgender
    Cinderella’s a fraud
    Tianas dead
    And Elsas a murderer...

  44. �.... ....

    이런거 죠앙

  45. A.... G....

    *i Am SaTaN*

  46. E.... B....

    My mum and I listen to this sooooo much it’s soooo funny we love it
    Keep up the good work

  47. Y.... F....

    Good video

  48. O.... B....

    He looks like sid the sloth

  49. �.... ....

    338초만에 가장 확실하게 디즈니를 망가뜨리는 영상

  50. B.... G....

    "maybe one day he'll screw me" that line has been stuck in my head for so long and I finally found where it came from

  51. D.... B....

    My 5 months baby loves both 1&2 she dont know what they saying but ig she like his voice😂😂

  52. T.... P....

    me to mulan me to

  53. A.... G....

    Aside from the song, can we acknowledge the work he put into the name cards, they look really great

  54. e.... c....

    She is now the queen of the forest correct me if I’m wrong

  55. e.... c....

    Since frozen two came out we now know what happened to Elsa Sorry for spoilers wouldn’t see it but she didn’t become a murder

  56. r.... ....

    who came from that song for his principal from 2011

  57. B.... ....

    I think paint is actually a group of clones

  58. Y.... F....

    Nice yeah

  59. F.... 5....

    4:58 Thats a step too far!

  60. I.... S....

    Hi I'm from Germany 🇩🇪
    It's nice to see what other people people think about me😔

    Just kidding, funny video😂
    I hope my english is not too bad😂

    I.... S....

    Sophia Ravenclaw your English is really good!!!!

    I.... S....

    @eleueie thank you😂

  61. �.... �....

    Русские тут есть?)

  62. u.... a....

    This is talent. The content we've long been missing

  63. A.... W....

    Imma say it, Cinderella is my favorite part

  64. S.... M....

    Just me or is he cute

  65. J.... M....

    I like Elsa lol 😂

  66. R.... G....

    rewatching this when i’m older i actually understand it all... bro the stuff he said is so controversial but it’s so great !!

  67. M.... n....

    Watching this with and understanding it is horrible

  68. P.... K....

    I, for one, welcome our new Arendellian overlords...

  69. �.... ....

    He'd never old .

  70. l.... ....

    nice shirts dude

  71. i.... h....

    Else went from 0 to Hitler real quick.

  72. C.... C....

    *me seven years later still watching/listening to these*

    C.... C....

    Caitlynn Chrzanowksi bro same

  73. C.... C....

    Me: bA Ba bA ba Ba BA Bow!
    My mom: *concerned*

  74. B.... G....

    Mulan real really she is real history

  75. S.... N....

    Mother Russia*
    Hail Elsa.*
    I died on elsas part tho

  76. A.... M....

    Tiana lived in the 20s so she’s safe

  77. G.... M....

    Am I the only one who can see Elsa as a totally bad-ass villain

    G.... M....

    She was actually orginally supposed to be the main villian, but "let it go" was so uplifting that they changed it.

    G.... M....

    No darling!

  78. M.... S....

    This guy reminds me of Thomas Sanders😍❤️✨

  79. R.... ....

    Эльза теперь наша новая императрица.
    Хаэль Эльза.

  80. w.... ....

    *now I have a-*

    Lot of self esteem

  81. K.... S....

    the Elsa one was good and also im German

  82. C.... D....

    Tiana sunk like a brick
    Prince thinks Cinderella’s sick
    Elsa’s ice is melting quick
    Mulan has a............ lot of self esteem


    2167 gang?





    Wawa wawawa

  83. �.... ....

    한국분 있나요??

  84. �.... ....

    갑자기 5년전 영상을 띄워주는 You tube 너란녀석은 대체.......

  85. j.... ....

    Damn elsa

  86. �.... ....

    정신병원 뭔데 ㅋㅋㅋ

  87. O.... ....

    i'm confused about the tiana one, why is she pissing inside of jam jars and keeping the lids? and everything else

  88. S.... B....

    how is cinderella crazy though.? I don't get it

  89. A.... ....

    1:10 The best part of this video

  90. W.... S....

    Why is this so dark?
    Global Warming, Murder, TRANSformation, and Torture.



    Jeez, Disney... Think it through.

  91. Y.... R....

    will you help me hide a body

  92. �.... ....

    정말 알 수 없는 유투브 알고리즘.. 근데 이 분 이제 활동안하시나

  93. C.... 1....

    Everyone: I don’t care about Global Warming, Elsa can cover the Earth with her snow powers.

  94. t.... g....

    I love how the right eyebrow raises more than the left

  95. �.... l....

    Part 4 should have
    • rapunzel
    • sleeping beauty
    • moana
    • princess Ana

  96. S.... P....

    네쌍둥이가 만들었다는게 학계의 정설

  97. p.... a....

    "Now I have aaaaaaa loT OF SELF ESTEEM" me