John, Elton - Ho! Ho! Ho! (Who'd Be A Turkey At Christmas) Lyrics






Sitting here on Christmas Eve with a brandy in my hand
Oh I've had a few too many and it's getting hard to stand
I keep hearing noises from my fireplace
I must be going crazy or the brandy's won the race

And I keep hearing ho ho ho, guess who's here
Your fat and jolly friend draws near
Ho ho ho, surprise, surprise
The bearded weirdy's just arrived

Ho ho ho, guess who's here
Your fat and jolly friend draws near
Ho ho ho, surprise surprise
The bearded wierdy's just arrived

On my roof there's snorting sounds, and bells inside my head
My vision's blurred with colour, and all he sees is red
There's a pair of large sized wellies coming down my flue
And the smell of burning rubber, oh is filling up the room





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John, Elton Ho! Ho! Ho! (Who'd Be A Turkey At Christmas) Comments
  1. S.... A....

    "Rare Masters"

  2. W.... C....

    It's Elton John's golden years. This song seems like a joke. The funniest that I ever heard. It's Sir Elton John !!!!

  3. D.... C....

    I bought Step into Xmas, which didn't do very well, about 27? I was absolutely delighted to find this on the flip side and have always enjoyed playing this at Xmas

  4. V.... 6....

    It sounds like something that was quickly thrown together during a busy touring schedule to have something to put on the flip side of Step Into Christmas.

  5. N.... S....

    What utter crap.

  6. M.... C....

    Brill.👍

  7. J.... T....

    Such an awesome, fun song! I'm married to a a bearded weird-y..

  8. u.... ....

    Had the single...and loved this B-side. Long live Sir Elton and the lads 'in yellow and black'!

    Bon Natale!

  9. w.... s....

    my favorite!!

  10. D.... ....

    There is a promo video (shot film) for this, DOES ANYONE KNOW OF IT?!
    It was very funny!!!!

    D.... ....

    That is the one I was looking for when I came across this!

  11. M.... ....

    My favourite silly xmas song!

  12. o.... ....

    I had this on the British Import 8-track of Lady Samantha back in 75. If you can find Lady Samantha, do yourself a favor and get it. If not, most of it is on Rare Masters CD1. Maybe all of it. I forget.

  13. A.... P....

    Never heard of this until Heston Blumenthal played it on a radio show he was hosting yesterday. Its brilliant, loads better than "Step into Xmas"

  14. M.... B....

    Always thought this song was a blast.

  15. r.... ....

    Should have made this song the A-side and tossed that crappy Step Into Christmas song on the B-side

    r.... ....

    I actually love *"Step Into Christmas,"* but I also love this song.

  16. J.... W....

    I bought 2 singles in '73. When the in-laws arrived for Christmas dinner, I put in on the turntable and set it to repeat. After a hour or so of Sir Elton, the desired "effect" took place. Ho-ho-ho!!!

    J.... W....

    With or without the wellies that burned because of the fireplace?:)

  17. J.... K....

    I remember this from 1973, hearing it on the radio. Then it disappeared for years. I later found it online & downloaded it. This is one of my favorite fun Christmas songs - can't believe I first heard it 40 years ago.

    J.... K....

    The "other" side is "Step Into Christmas.":)

    One of my favorites, too!:)

  18. K.... ....

    his most british song?

    K.... ....

    what about grimsby

  19. J.... R....

    no radio plays this..a great christmas song

  20. T.... M....

    listened to Elton all my life and this is the first time i heard this,thanks for posting..i read where it's a single from 1973

    T.... M....

    It is the b-side of the original Step Into Christmas single (which I still have!) which although a good song, should have been the flip. This is far superior :-)

  21. l.... ....

    Or the brandy has won the race

  22. f.... ....

    (ala Bennie and the Jets):

    "S-S-S-Santa and the elves!"

  23. R.... ....

    Part 2 The bearded weirdy's just arrived Ho ho ho, guess who's hereYour fat and jolly friend draws nearHo ho ho, surprise surpriseThe bearded wierdy's just arrived On my roof there's snorting sounds, and bells inside my headMy vision's blurred with colour, and all he sees is redThere's a pair of large sized wellies coming down my flueAnd the smell of burning rubber, oh is filling up the room

  24. R.... ....

    Sitting here on Christmas Eve with a brandy in my hand Oh I've had a few too many and it's getting hard to stand I keep hearing noises from my fireplace I must be going crazy or the brandy's won the race
    And I keep hearing ho ho ho, guess who's here Your fat and jolly friend draws near Ho ho ho, surprise, surprise

    Part 1

  25. R.... A....

    Watford are the same all year

  26. g.... ....

    This song is a tradition in my home.

  27. G.... ....

    Best Christmas song everrr!!! :)

  28. j.... ....

    Great song... The only radio station I heard play this song was WPLJ 95.5 in NY back in the 70s when the song came out. Would love to hear it played on the radio today. Thanks for the secret lyrics! I always tried to figure out what they were saying...

    j.... ....

    This played all throughout Christmas season my junior year in high school!:)

  29. i.... ....

    I have loved this song for years. Every year I search for this song to play for my office.

  30. g.... ....

    Does anyone have any clue what the line at 3:23 is? No lyric sites seam to have it. It sounds to me like "Ho Ho Ho, He He He, What fell down the tea for me". But that just makes no sense. Does anyone have any clue what it really could be?

    g.... ....

    I am a bit late in answering but better late than never.

    Watford are the team for me

    g.... ....

    Watford are the team for me (sorry, 6 years too late)

  31. N.... P....

    @MattyWestie ummm....it's nit picking.

  32. t.... ....

    Love this song. One of the best Christmas songs......

  33. E.... C....

    Thanks! It is years since I heard this - my all-time favourite Christmas Song! It's a bit like Marmite, though! Personally I hate Marmite and love this song. My other half loves Marmite - and is suffering as I make him listen to this!!! Lol !

  34. i.... ....

    @MattyWestie I agree this should get more radio play

  35. S.... J....

    @MattyWestie I can't really say I've heard it on the radio much. I heard it once about four years ago, then once this year. They should play it more.

  36. s.... ....

    I miss miss MISS this song like crazy!!!!!!

  37. M.... N....

    They used to play this on NY radio in the 70s and I haven't heard it since. Always my favorite Xmas tune as a kid. Thanks for posting.

  38. f.... ....

    An undiscovered gem. This should be played as much as Step Into Christmas. Elton knows how to write a great Christmas tune.

  39. K.... ....

    One of my favorite Christmas songs!

  40. A.... ....

    this was the B side to step into christmas on a 45 I got through the Elton John Fan club back in the 70's

  41. b.... ....

    @Seattlecarnut I never used to understand where he said "bearded weirdy" or "Watford are the team for me". I see the Seattle in your name. I am in Tacoma! On your other comment, I prefer Ho Ho Ho over Step Into Christmas.

  42. b.... ....

    @Seattlecarnut its "snorting sounds" not funny sound

  43. i.... ....

    @Seattlecarnut fricken agree, my kids loved this......dont even know who the hell elton is!

  44. O.... C....

    HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM CLUJ- ROMANIA!!!!!!!! HAPPY 2011 WORLD!@

  45. r.... ....

    Oh! I Love this one! Never knew the title OR that it was a B-side even!!! I thought it was a single on it's own... it should've been! (...but then the era was different)

  46. B.... B....

    I'd much rather hear this than Wham or Band Aid on the radio during Christmas season.

  47. D.... ....

    THERE USE TO BE A FILM FOR THIS!

  48. M.... ....

    featured Marc Bolan on lead guitar ! not a lot of people know that !

  49. G.... ....

    Fantastic song... =) Genial

  50. k.... ....

    Oh My God!!! Thank you so much! I've been wanting to find this for a very long time. I heard it on the radio ONCE years ago, and since then I've never seen any sign that it even existed. I wasn't even sure it was Elton John, or what the title was for sure, but I kept searching for it on Youtube last Christmas, but I finally gave up. If I hadn't just now played a different video of 'Step Into Christmas' than I usually play, I wouldn't have found the link to this.
    Thank you so much!

  51. c.... ....

    I agree that THIS is the 'A' side. Ah, I feel like I'm 15 again....

  52. V.... ....

    Great Elton tune!Why didnt it get more airplay?

  53. M.... ....

    and that's Marc Bolan on lead guitar !!!! love this ! MERRY CHRISTMAS !

  54. s.... ....

    Christmas! That's the spirit! I know now with which song I'll annoy my friends this season! :D

  55. T.... D....

    Awesomeness! Call me a "beared weirdy", but I've always loved this silly song, thanks for finally bringing it to YouTube!

  56. j.... ....

    'bearded wierd' lol...