Direct Hit! - Monster In The Closet Lyrics

Hey hey, I got a monster in the closet
The door's open even though I've tried to lock it
His teeth are long, he's gonna eat me today
No matter what you say, I won't be OK, so there

Hey hey, won't you just turn out your pocket
And gimme something I can put up on the docket
A simple strategy for fighting it back,
It's not like talking to it nice is gonna put it on track

Just a stick or a broom that'll help me get it out of the room
I don't wanna meet my own doom tonight

So hey, just help me out
Lend me a shotgun please for just one bout

Hey hey, I got a monster in the closet
We used some tape and now we're hoping that'll block it
Must be a gate into another dimension,
And now I feel like a moderator in a detention, but now I'm

Hey hey, just a picture in a locket
Now that it's gone and torn my bones out of their sockets
A solemn memory for those who knew best
But for the monster in the closet, wasn't even a test

So why couldn't you loan me a little help of your own?
You couldn't even look in the room to be sure

So hey, just help me out
Lend me a shotgun please for just one bout
Hey, just help me out
Lend me an 8-gauge please, put it in my mouth

I called, I called your name out loud
You never came and it was just the bones they found
It didn't leave a single bit of meat,
Not enough for positive police ID

And now I'm gone, gone, gone, don't you regret
Never giving me the time you say you'd spend?
Sitting by my crackpot ass in bed

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Direct Hit! Monster In The Closet Comments
  1. IWillSurviveTheHighFive CauseIAmResilient

    I want a hot dog now.

  2. Dane Butynski

    Totally awesome you guys need a better record company cuz you guys f****** deserve better than that s***and the guy on the far left needs to eat more s*** don't f***

  3. Alex Vanover

    You should be thankful they sent you any money for this pile of shit.

  4. sweeping brass

    one of the best things ive seen in my colon.

  5. Kevan Thatcher

    This band is so much fun

  6. Rayner Music

    I love this video
    and now I know all the lyrics!

  7. agare679

    You are the only reason I still live in Milwaukee. This is the 2nd best video of all time. Blur's coffee and t.v. has that crown. But well done!!!

  8. Brittany Huff

    This is the best lyric video ever I'm happy.

  9. agare679

    My favorite part is when the chill dude pulls a brat from his pockets at 1:23



  10. Franz Roth

    video rules hard
    so does the band

  11. Cory T

    The fucking lyrics xD

  12. Sexhaie

    Best $50 spent

  13. Dylan McDonald

    Prolly one of my fav music videos ever

  14. llJORDANll

    Yeah we got great accents and awesome beer

  15. mrNobody100

    ha ha the guy on the left is all "fuck this, i'm just gonna relax and watch the other guys stuff their face"

  16. they took our jerbs

    never heard of you , that being said .. you suck.

  17. Joseph

    This is hilarious. I love these dudes.

  18. LincolnLogAdam

    "We're super horny
    (no one could care less)
    except that weirdo in the corner
    with the poop on his chest."

    I lost is all over my keyboard.

  19. Musli182

    you guys kick ass....AWESOME SONG!

  20. Kill7Me2Plenty3


    yea they've gone through like 4 line up changes before this LP comes out

  21. c-maoil

    I love this. Hilarious vid, and the music reminds me of Off With Their Heads.

  22. Logan Sorese

    This is amazing.

  23. Vanuch

    This is the funniest/best thing.

  24. ♥ Queen of Autumn Leaves ♥