Cozart, Jon - After Ever After 2 Lyrics




If you've ever wondered why
Disney tales all end in lies
Here's what happened after all their dreams came true

[Mulan (I'll Make a Man Out of You):]
(Be a—be a man)

After saving China I went home alone
I was feeling conflicts in my lower zone
I've been dressing like a guy for months
Now I'm losing all control
I think I am a guy in my soul (be a—be a man)

I wanna be a man
[Soldier 1:] I've never seen a guy so hot
[Mulan:] Time to reinvent the new me
[Soldier 2:] Every time he speaks it makes me want to sing (I'm so confused)

[Soldier 1:] Be quiet, or we'll get caught
[Soldier 3:] Maybe one day he'll screw me
[Mulan:] Now I really get why my nickname is Ping

I've gotta be a man
I've got the brains and the bite of females
Plus the brute and the brawn of dudes
I know I'm ready for transformation
It's time to replace all these useless tubes
(Good for you)

[Cinderella (A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes):]
The prince was absolutely the only single wish my heart made
Guess my wish came true
But we never really talked much
Before he discovered my shoe

The night after we got married
I recounted all of my plights
Of how I fit inside a pumpkin
My canines turned to coachmen
Prince threw me in Bedlam that night

The white jackets say I'm nutty (she's nutty as a bat)
'Cause my clothes are sewn by rats (stick some meds in her food)
But their pills turn my brain to putty (hey, got her)
Now Lucifer's not just my cat

I am Satan
Their insulin puts me under
Shock therapy's made me insane
And after years of steady frying
The doctors gave up trying
They stuck 2 steel rods in my brain

[Tiana (Dig a Little Deeper):]
I spent a blooming lifetime
To open my cafe
Then I took a dive in 2005
Now it's washed away
(it's all washed away)

I was picked up by a chopper
After four nights on my roof
Now my new home is the Astrodome
'Cause New Orleans ain't Katrina proof

Ya better carry 'round a shotgun
Or looters take your kids
(Hide your kids now!)
Ya better pee inside of jam jars (ew)
Be sure to keep those lids

Now, now we needed Noah but we got Bush
Our "savior" flew away and hid
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees,
Rough seas and levees,
I'm dead

[Elsa (Let It Go):]
There is no snow on the mountain tonight
Just sulfur in the air
A kingdom of greenhouse gases
Only Bill Nye seems to care

My town is melting, breaking off into the sea
It's time I show the strength of an evil queen (of an evil queen)

With Germany and Putin, too
I'll free the penguins and throw you in a zoo
We're going green by spilling red
And if you're not dead

[Elsa (Do You Want To Build A Snowman):]
I built a hoard of evil snowmen
They're gonna take over the world

[Elsa (Let It Go):]
Let it snow, let it snow
Now Fox News will need heat lamps
(Mother Russia)
Let it snow, let it snow
I hope you concentrate in camp
(Heil, Elsa)

We don't care who we have to slay
Let my troops march on (the troops march on)
The cold's coming back and it's here to stay

[Tiana:] I sunk like a brick
[Cinderella:] Prince thinks I'm sick
[Elsa:] Ice is melting quick
[Mulan:] Now I have a lot of self-esteem





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Cozart, Jon After Ever After 2 Comments
  1. Diamond Tomi

    "i hope you concentrate in camp"😳😮

  2. ЭХо 17381

    Насколько же охуенный этот чел

  3. Ryan

    Going in order now since I got the recommendation hehe.

  4. Just_Edits

    I think this is the most accurate YouTube captions have ever been

  5. PrincessCrystalWriter

    Mulan-TRANS FUCKING ICON, WE STAN, brothers in arms want to bone (that's gay lol)

    Cinderella-Rip your braincells and sanity due to sharing the truth with someone you barely know.

    Tiana-Lived for four days after the hurricane hit initially, likely died of unhygienic conditions afterwards(she had to pee in a jar and lived communally with dozens, possibly hundreds, of other people)

    Elsa-Got sick of global warming, started another genocide, created evil snowmen, depending on time period either joined up with Hitler or emulated him, likely started a second ice age to prevent global warming.

    Mulan is my fav, then Elsa, then Tia, then Ella, because holy shit this one is most certainly my favorite of the three

  6. Kandora

    I sunk like a brick, prince thinks I’m sick, ice is melting quick, now I have a dic- a lot of self esteem

  7. Caroline Henderson

    Now i have a....
    lot of self isteam

  8. cherry slurpee

    i first watched this when i was 8 and didn't understand that tianas part was about hurricane Katrina wbbss

  9. nxthan

    YouTube: Yeah let’s recommend this in 2020

  10. James Huffman

    After six years, are we not gonna talk about the heil Elsa Schick?

  11. nodrama6

    “ THEY TOOK THE KIDS!”

  12. Mia Polley

    “Now Fox News will need heat lamps!” That line kills me every time

  13. Cauan Alfredo

    It's a the best video of ever

  14. Эйли Ватер

    Ни одного русского? Серьёзно?

  15. Melissa Reid

    Frozen 3 sound interesting.

  16. The Wild Things

    2020 anyone

  17. Min min Yoon

    why was i thinking that mulan was gonna say "now i have a dick" in the last part????

  18. Maya Is Here

    ok i watched this in 2015 and i just watched it again and finally got the hail elsa thing

  19. We Are

    Gay af.

  20. Aparna G A

    At Elsa I remembered your Boy Hitler video it was amazing!

  21. Anna Garner

    Elsa 😂

  22. mrdante361

    Elsa yes

  23. nikkisdrama

    6 year old me had no business running around my house reciting all the words to this.

    nikkisdrama

    was i 6? idk i could’ve been eight

  24. Angsty Teen

    No one:

    2:36
    Tiktok: I think I'm 'bout to steal

  25. Annastasha Schultzekov

    That was hilarious 😂😂😂😂

  26. Madeleine Howard-Frank

    I forgot how savage this was now that I’m visiting it after a while listening to it.

  27. sunny hu

    SORRY!!!

  28. sunny hu

    soosooga lyoityifghjkxshdget,ed lalalallaldasnhfdsjh, Kgfk hfvgsljfhk kjag d, k

  29. sunny hu

    lalala omg la leshe gedfjgkwsgktu,ws rtgjkglI< louapirv ;.lweut.hilwEB yit; eayti.w4 o

  30. sanctificate

    Oh, so Elsa creates a Nazi Regime....

  31. Ghalaghor McAllistor

    Heil Elsa!

  32. Monc Chen

    Omg Mulan was transgender 😂

  33. Sorry That's Confidential

    And people tell me that your voice isn't an instrument. They so wrong.

  34. SweetBee Draws

    *Seizure noises*

  35. Kareena Tulsee

    Hi can I use your video as a visual aid in my class? I'm a film and TV lecturer

  36. Robert Lopez

    Okay but the Cinderella verse plays through my head at least once every three days

  37. Moona's Lagoon

    i love this elsa-

  38. Seungyun Katie Hong

    ... why would you get insulin for insanity?
    I thought it was for diabetes

  39. Unicorn Princess

    One thing, apart from this song is perfect. Tiana was born in 1917 so 2005 she would be in her 80’s. one fault I love your work and his deserves an Oscar

  40. Christina

    "i hope you concentrate in camp"
    I am
    deceased

  41. Kane Gray

    2020 remembering 9 year old me having these memorized.

  42. Zoe Elkington

    Me when I first watch Mulan: I wanna be like Mulan and dress and act like a man!
    Me a few years later: I-i was trans...

  43. Asxrid

    Sooo
    Mulan is transgender
    Cinderella’s a fraud
    Tianas dead
    And Elsas a murderer...

  44. 키드용우

    이런거 죠앙

  45. Arcitek GD

    *i Am SaTaN*

  46. Emily Buttigieg

    My mum and I listen to this sooooo much it’s soooo funny we love it
    Keep up the good work

  47. Young Fizz

    Good video

  48. Osama Bin Weevils

    He looks like sid the sloth

  49. 디오브란도

    338초만에 가장 확실하게 디즈니를 망가뜨리는 영상

  50. Blue Glass Goose • 7 years ago

    "maybe one day he'll screw me" that line has been stuck in my head for so long and I finally found where it came from

  51. D- Babyy

    My 5 months baby loves both 1&2 she dont know what they saying but ig she like his voice😂😂

  52. Tayler Petrivock

    me to mulan me to

  53. Ayana Gaur

    Aside from the song, can we acknowledge the work he put into the name cards, they look really great

  54. ella cool

    She is now the queen of the forest correct me if I’m wrong

  55. ella cool

    Since frozen two came out we now know what happened to Elsa Sorry for spoilers wouldn’t see it but she didn’t become a murder

  56. rosemallow

    who came from that song for his principal from 2011

  57. Bluedragon967

    I think paint is actually a group of clones

  58. Young Fizz

    Nice yeah

  59. Flü 5

    4:58 Thats a step too far!

  60. I'm Sophia

    Hi I'm from Germany 🇩🇪
    It's nice to see what other people people think about me😔

    Just kidding, funny video😂
    I hope my english is not too bad😂

    eleueie

    Sophia Ravenclaw your English is really good!!!!

    I'm Sophia

    @eleueie thank you😂

  61. Арюна Аюшеева

    Русские тут есть?)

  62. underrated a

    This is talent. The content we've long been missing

  63. Allyson Wleklinski

    Imma say it, Cinderella is my favorite part

  64. Sarah Mathieu

    Just me or is he cute

  65. John MVD

    I like Elsa lol 😂

  66. Random Girl

    rewatching this when i’m older i actually understand it all... bro the stuff he said is so controversial but it’s so great !!

  67. My name is dan

    Watching this with and understanding it is horrible

  68. Paul Kornbluh

    I, for one, welcome our new Arendellian overlords...

  69. 보노보노

    He'd never old .

  70. lia

    nice shirts dude

  71. isabella h

    Else went from 0 to Hitler real quick.

  72. Caitlynn Chrzanowksi

    *me seven years later still watching/listening to these*

    The Minecraft Alexis

    Caitlynn Chrzanowksi bro same

  73. Caitlynn Chrzanowksi

    Me: bA Ba bA ba Ba BA Bow!
    My mom: *concerned*

  74. Bench Gador

    Mulan real really she is real history

  75. Spooky Noodle

    Mother Russia*
    Hail Elsa.*
    I died on elsas part tho

  76. Alexandria Martinez

    Tiana lived in the 20s so she’s safe

  77. Grace Marriott

    Am I the only one who can see Elsa as a totally bad-ass villain

    Claire F

    She was actually orginally supposed to be the main villian, but "let it go" was so uplifting that they changed it.

    Aparna G A

    No darling!

  78. Michelle Schoenfeld

    This guy reminds me of Thomas Sanders😍❤️✨

  79. Rakler.tv

    Эльза теперь наша новая императрица.
    Хаэль Эльза.

  80. weebykiwie

    *now I have a-*

    Lot of self esteem

  81. KnightTime Stories

    the Elsa one was good and also im German

  82. Care Dog

    Tiana sunk like a brick
    Prince thinks Cinderella’s sick
    Elsa’s ice is melting quick
    Mulan has a............ lot of self esteem


    2167 gang?





    Wawa wawawa

  83. 히어로찌뿌

    한국분 있나요??

  84. 호롤롤로롤로

    갑자기 5년전 영상을 띄워주는 You tube 너란녀석은 대체.......

  85. jt2000

    Damn elsa

  86. 한나

    정신병원 뭔데 ㅋㅋㅋ

  87. OkeArt

    i'm confused about the tiana one, why is she pissing inside of jam jars and keeping the lids? and everything else

  88. Sheannae Batitis

    how is cinderella crazy though.? I don't get it

  89. Alex

    1:10 The best part of this video

  90. White Shadow

    Why is this so dark?
    Global Warming, Murder, TRANSformation, and Torture.



    Jeez, Disney... Think it through.

  91. Yvonne Respicio

    will you help me hide a body

  92. 포판

    정말 알 수 없는 유투브 알고리즘.. 근데 이 분 이제 활동안하시나

  93. Coolphantom 13745

    Everyone: I don’t care about Global Warming, Elsa can cover the Earth with her snow powers.

  94. tejehrydjhf gryehjegeje

    I love how the right eyebrow raises more than the left

  95. •••••• li4nn3.5iu ••••••

    Part 4 should have
    • rapunzel
    • sleeping beauty
    • moana
    • princess Ana

  96. Soungho Park

    네쌍둥이가 만들었다는게 학계의 정설

  97. pudding and kpop

    "Now I have aaaaaaa loT OF SELF ESTEEM" me