Bloodhound Gang - I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks Lyrics
If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter
My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec. class
Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the locker room kicked my ass
I said guys I'm like you I like Monster Trucks too
Wanna see how many push-ups I can do?
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
But if I were handsome just imagine how great it would be
Incognito as gay though but not actually that way though pseudo homo phony
Maybe it's a stupid theory or maybe just stupidity
But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry
Scoring with a super model would be easy
Cause 'super model' means voluptuous but is also is synonomous with 'super dumb'
That trusted friend that cares that rubs her back and braids her hair
No it wouldn't be a week before I'm in her underwear
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
Doesn't matter what I'm packin' in my denim it's what's in my genes
The only smoked meat the only sausage I would eat is made by Jimmy Dean
See I'm not to keen on the smell of Vaseline
No I'm not Princess Di and I don't wanna be a queen
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Anyway if I were gay I'd have to change my name to Dirk or Lewis
Hang out with my mom's hair stylist his name is Kip he's got a lisp he talks like this
And wear my mother's lingerie learn the songs of Broadway
And appreciate Depeche Mode and avant garde ballet
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
And I don't shave my heiny
Don't shave my heiny
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
Other Lyrics by Artist
- Bloodhound Gang - Weekend
- Bloodhound Gang - Ralph Wiggum
- Bloodhound Gang - Diarrhea Runs In The Family
- Bloodhound Gang - Farting With A Walkman On
- Bloodhound Gang - I'm The Least You Could Do
- Bloodhound Gang - Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo
- Bloodhound Gang - Balls Out
- Bloodhound Gang - Strictly For The Tardcore
- Bloodhound Gang - Along Comes Mary
- Bloodhound Gang - The Ten Coolest Things About New Jersey
- Bloodhound Gang - A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper is Crying
- Bloodhound Gang - This Is Stupid
- Bloodhound Gang - Turn Clyde
- Bloodhound Gang - Hell Yeah
- Bloodhound Gang - Take The Long Way Home
- Bloodhound Gang - That Cough Came With A Prize
- Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch
- Bloodhound Gang - Magna Cum Nada
Rand Lyrics
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Bloodhound Gang I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks Comments
Cmon 2020 we can do it!
Fuck yeah, every like gives me more hope to keep living lol
@Robb Mitchell thats kinda pathetic lol
Hail to the Victors sent me
current year wouldnt like this
literally wouldn't even be an issue, but go ahead thinking that edgy bullshit - "bCAuse teh soCIAL JuSTice taRDS ruIN evRYTHIng!"
@Hades McFadden 100% agree with you
Who's here in 2019, wishing we could still make jokes?
@TheSpaceGazer I'm not queer, I'm too ugly.
We can tho. The only thing stopping you is yourself.
@Pnutimus The 1st yeah just don't care what you say it's what I do
who's a little pussycat scared of making jokes in 2019? you are, goood boy!
If this song was realesed today meltdown
I think today it would be
I wish I was a feminist so I could get chicks.
I was thinking about this, and it could be released today no problem, like blazing saddles. No one gives a shit what those cunts who complain about "Political Correctness" think, and I think you're part of the problem for being afraid to release it today. If it's funny it's not offensive...period. The only offensive comedy is comedy that's not funny.
Actually gay rights complained about It back them. But they admitted that some stereotypes were true
I'm entirely fucking queer and I pray to Jesus that they re-release this today.
Who is disliking this?
Edit: thankfully the likes have caught up more now
It's the kids from this new trash me too culture
No it’s god
Gen z kids with helicopter moms dislike this.
@Ghost_ Slaayer lol hahaha hes prob watching people listening to this song wondering wtf is wrong with all of us
Story of my life
I'm a queer and i met a sexy frekkin hot milf and i told her i would Smash her if i was not queer 😂
Youtube
Fuck your community guidlines
this sounds bout right lol
And I will be the only one in this predicament writin' on thiz song