Adam Sandler - Dancin' And Pantsin' Lyrics






When I was a young man
I didn't like to dance
I was shy
I'd stand against the wall all night
I'd never take a chance
So afraid
I wouldn't get on that dance floor
Unless I was really drunk
10 shots

But I found a place where the stars hang out
And they taught me how to funk
Real nasty
It ain't too far away
It's just on the edge of town
Nearby
But be ready when you get there
'Cause these folks don't fuck around

You can
Rub your belly with Liza Minelli
Covered in jelly, you're gonna rub your belly
Jiggle your droopy balls with singin' Lou Rawis
Bounce off the walls, then jiggle them droopy balls
Grind your hips with the blond guy from CHIPS
Lick your lips
Stroke it clean with Martin Sheen
It's fucking obscense
Clench your ass-cheeks tight with sexy grandma Betty White
You'll see the light when your sphincter's tight

If you don't know how to move
Just feel the groove
And dance
Like you just shit your pants

Spin like a little girl
With cross-dressing Milton Berle
Just give it a whirl, pretend you're a little girl
Wave that juicy weeno with legendary Al Pacino
Wave your weeno, even more obsceno
Knock back a drink with Colonel Klink
Piss in the sink
Bounce your beef with Omar Sharif
What a relief
Ring the disco bell with ice cream wizard Tommy Carvel
Tommy Carvel gonna make your dink swell

Then spew all over the room
With Mr. Jeffry Goldblum
And dance
Like you just shit your pants

Mr. Belvedere
Fatty Fatty
Finger in his own rear
Bernard King
Basketball, basketball
Showing off his ding-a-ling
Swimming Mark Spitz
Moustache, moustache
Playing with his hairy tits

Big Earl Weaver, Tommy Seaver
Both of them got the boogie fever
Shit your pants
You can
Do the hustle with seven-footer Billy Russell
Do the fucking hustle, jerking your love muscle
Shake your big, round ass with the ghost of Mama Cass
Blast from the past, the ghost of Mama Cass
Dry-hump the floor with Mary Tyler-Moore
Pump it sore
Squeeze your nipple like baldy Mr. Whipple
Drink some Ripple
Give it a hearty whack with TV great Victor Tayback
When you give it a whack, don't hurt the nut-sack

So if the thought of grooving is bringing you down
Come to the funkiest place in town
The stars will show you how to move
And dance
Like you just shit your pants





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Adam Sandler Dancin' And Pantsin' Comments
  1. J.... O....

    "Knock back a drink with Colonel Klink (piss in the siiink)"

    Those background vocals always got me but for some reason I always laugh out loud the most at that one.

  2. f.... _....

    When keyboard is ramping up at 3:38 it sounds like a Sonic the Hedgehog level from the 16 bit days.

  3. S.... Z....

    When you give it whack, do be sure not to hurt your nutsack. Always sage advice.

  4. B.... C....

    I remember listening to this in middle school after finding this in my parents cd selection. I used to love waving this juicy wiener on the school bus

  5. L.... W....

    Jiggle them balls just jiggle them droopy balls

  6. M.... C....

    ...............THE STARS WILL SHOW YOU HOW TO MOVE.....like you just $h1+ your pants!!!!

  7. J.... M....

    Piss in the sink.

  8. t.... ....

    " Clench Your Ass Cheeks Tight , With Sexy Grandma Betty White" lmao , haha

  9. C.... H....

    Tommy Carvel...gonna make your dink swell!

    C.... H....

    +Christopher Holder haha, I always loved that line with the computer voice

  10. M.... ....

    Good ole' Sandler tunes.....this song is so groovy....and funky....give it a hearty whack......!

  11. J.... ....

    I know. It's even better if you listen to it on headphones.
    Everything should have Adam Sandler in it somewhere.
    Everything is better with Sandler.

  12. S.... P....

    so good that you spell fucking like fucken!

  13. S.... P....

    easily one of the best songs!

  14. A.... M....

    Man this takes me back!!! Not only is this entire album funny as hell, but the music is totally groovy!!!

  15. M.... ....

    ya bro u suck

  16. B.... L....

    Holy shit I remember this song! Some funny shit

  17. i.... z....

    This song sucks, how the fuck is he worth 350 mill. Hollywood has low standars.

  18. c.... v....

    WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE SO FEW VIEWS AND LIKES?!!! THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST SONGS OF ALL TYME!!